I just went through what is called a "dry" Valentine's Day so let me say up front that Terri Carlson, a good-looking 45-year-old blonde divorcee from California is evermore my kind of girl. The way I understand it, her Valentine's Day was a dry one, too, so she's as itchy as I am.

Trouble is, we could never hit if off because she's got a rare genetic disorder called C-4 Complement Deficiency, which is an autoimmune disease that prevents her body from being able to fight off infections. I, too, have a life-long affliction. Mine is known as osteomylitis, which is where my various infections lie dormant until something like Terri triggers them and then they come out like angry vipers. The first time we kissed we'd probably both blow up.

But what Terri has working for her is that today she's in high demand. The unbelievable part is that her divorce two years ago put her in the cross hairs of the biggest mess you can imagine. She could never afford health insurance with her C-4 problems and, when her existing COBRA policy runs out in May 2011, it looks for all the world like she'll soon be bankrupt, unable to afford her expensive medicines, and will soon croak.

But guess what the enterprising mother-of-four did last month? She got on YouTube, showed off how cute she is and how pretty she can be, and then very boldly said, "I'll marry any man who has good health insurance!

"I don't care what you look like. But what I do care about is how good your health insurance is. So, you want me to respond to you? Attach your health-care benefit information," she says right into the camera and - are you ready for this - she's had over 5,000 proposals already.

Yes, she's a babe. Go to her new website, www.willmarryforhealthinsurance.com, and see for yourself. Sure, the thing started as a joke, but, brother, now it has heated up in a way she's really serious. On another website there was an interview recently with her and she openly explained that she's "looking for love" so why not make sure her suitors - and oh those boys are lining up - are all "friends with benefits."

"I was already on Match.com," she explained. "When you're filling out something for a dating website you say that you want brown hair or blue eyes. I don't think that asking that someone have good health insurance is any different than asking for someone to be a certain religion. I think it's additional criteria.

"I think that out of all of these thousands of emails, I can have good health insurance and love at the same time. But I do know this: I wouldn't marry anyone without good health insurance. There's no way. I can't. But, yes, I plan to be married within the next year." Wow!

Now, before you get too carried away, listen to what else Terri tells us about her responses. "By the time I had my first interview with the media, I had 100 proposals. As of (last week), I had 7,000 messages in my inbox from around the world. Half of those are probably proposals, and the other half are from suffering people.

"A lot of the responses come from people just like me. They have the most heartbreaking stories. They're saying things like, 'You're a voice for us,' and 'Please help us.' It just breaks my heart.

"I've also just got a contract where they want to do a reality series where they follow me as I go on dates with these guys who've written in to my website. I'm looking at it right now."

Her insurance plight comes as an estimated 50 million Americans are without health insurance. She says, "I mean how is it possible that I live in the wealthiest country in the world and can't get health insurance? One of the things I put in one of my videos - and it's so true - at one point I seriously thought about selling all of my assets, giving them to my children, and going and robbing a bank. Because then I could go to jail and I could get three meals a day for free, I could work out, and I could get health care.

"I have a problem with the fact that I'm someone who works hard every day, and yet someone who is a drain on society and commits a crime can get better health care than me. I'm a hard-working person who's never had a speeding ticket," she said candidly.

"That just shows how screwed up our system is. This whole thing came out of my frustration and what I needed, but I realize that there are just so many other people right there with me."

One more question. If you could speak to a joint meeting of the Senate and Congress, what would you say? "It would be simple: While you are all fighting between the Senate and the House and bickering, people like me are suffering and dying. While they're fighting, we're the ones suffering.

"I feel like the Republicans now are just trying to say no to everything instead of trying to make a point to pass the thing that they all agree upon, which is the pre-existing conditions clause. They're being stubborn children. People are suffering while they're taking their time."

But, Terri, aren't you selling out a bit too cheaply? I mean, you might end up with some hairy-legged guy who scratches and snorts and drinks beer all the time. "Wouldn't an illegal immigrant marry an American to have U.S. citizenship? It makes them dependent, but they're willing to do it so that they can come to our country.

"I don't think it's that different. I don't think it's prehistoric. It's not like an arranged marriage. I have a choice. I'm not just selling myself out to the first person who has health insurance. I have choices, but believe me, people have done a lot worse for a lot less."

Gosh, isn't Terri Carlson the real deal? No, I can't kiss her, but, lordy, I sure do love her moxie.

royexum@aol.com