I am not a good speaker but I have made hundreds of speeches on a variety of subjects. I hated to make speeches. However most folks thought I loved to make speeches. I resolved many years ago not to let shyness keep me from pushing my goals. Public speaking was an important tool for promoting my projects.

Many people have mike fright. I didn’t. I was on TV and radio for many years and was very comfortable in front of a microphone. You might say I had people fright. I would prepare more, and worry more, about a talk to twenty or thirty people than I would for an audience of thousands on TV or radio.

In 1943 in the Army Air Force at Milwaukee State Teacher’s College (now the University of Wisconsin), I had a brief course on public speaking. One impromptu talk, I told about the squirrels in Highland Park coming down the power lines from the National Cemetery. Some of the guys started calling me “Squirrel”. One signed my graduation picture “Watch out for the squirrels, Rebel.” Maybe this contributed to my people fright.

Years later in the Chattanooga Jaycees, most of us could not afford to take the Dale Carnegie Course; however, Ed Riley and Leroy Glasscock, enrolled, and then trained us cheapskates. This completed my limited training for public speaking. We were all urged to accept all speaking opportunities. I was so involved with community projects; I had a host of opportunities. I accepted reluctantly. Most of the early talks were on such subjects as: undesirable comic books, pornography, homosexuality, juvenile delinquency, and youth welfare. Even a poor speaker could hold the audiences attention on these topics

Some times these subjects provided interesting visuals which served as a crutch. Another crutch was having someone in the audience to try to embarrass. Bill Valentine was a favorite target. When I spotted Roy Bachelor in the audience, I would say I got acquainted with Roy when I was working on a homosexual problem. He was a prominent educator who assisted the Jaycee project aimed at protecting youngsters from predators, but the audience didn’t know that. In later years, I loved to shoot at Jack Anderson. To this day, Jack hates to be in an audience when I have the microphone. Having folks in the audience that can take kidding, like Bill and Jack, help me to relax and warm up the audience. It also allowed me to show a sense of humor. This helped the audience and me, too, because when I was pushing a project, sometimes I was too intense.

Reverend Jim Emerson, Jaycee Religious Activities Chairman, conned me into making a few speeches. Bettye and I were married by Jim at Thankful Memorial Episcopal, a beautiful stone church at the foot of Lookout Mountain.

Of course many of my later talks were related to tourism, first as a Jaycee volunteer and then as CEO of the Convention and Visitors Bureau. The audiences got bigger but I found the larger crowds (up to 5,000) were less personal. The small live audiences still make me nervous. I never considered myself a good speaker, but my sincerity and especially my enthusiasm came through. Basically, I became a salesman-selling my ideas on my favorite projects. My most rewarding speech is reported in the chapter about my favorite preacher. Basically, our family had three delightful vacations because I did a 45 minute speech in 15 minutes at the South Carolina Tri-Centennial Celebration.

Very few speeches qualified for an Honorarium. I never questioned that; I wouldn’t pay to hear me speak either. When I spoke at the Governor’s Conference in Mobile, they met me at the airport and took me to the hotel in a Pierce Arrow. It was so big that I couldn’t touch the front seat from the back seat. Special treatment like this was flattering, but a little awkward for me. The car owner was so nice. Later, he picked me up and took me to see his collection of antique cars, everything from Stanley Steamers to electric cars. Wonder if he came to hear my speech?

They say it is very important that a speaker be properly introduced. I was speaking at a National Tourism Conference and was introduced by the CEO of the Atlanta Convention and Visitors Bureau. My biography, intended for a variety of groups, mostly local, included some unrelated things such as PTA President, church activities and a lot of things not related to tourism. I encouraged short intros using two or three items. My introducer read all the minor, unrelated stuff and skipped all the important and related information. I was amazed and wondered about his motive. If he was out to undermine me, it backfired. Many of the audience expressed admiration that I would take the time to be PTA President, Elder, etc. I never learned his motive but was glad when this guy left Atlanta. I would much rather have poor introductions as long, flowery ones.

One of the dumbest things I ever did was to speak at the Discover America Conference in Lake Placid, NY. My talk followed the Travel Editor of Southern Living Magazine (Caleb Pirtle). He always got a standing ovation, after him; there was only one direction to go----down. Dr Pat Choate, Tennessee’s Commissioner of Economic Development was sitting next to me. He leaned over and whispered to me, “You poor bastard”. I started my speech by quoting him to invoke the sympathy of the entire audience. (Pat was the guy who ran for Vice President on the ticket with Ross Perot).

For some reason, the Jaycees were some of my toughest audiences. Maybe it was because I realized that they knew me so well. While I was Jaycee President, I had the floor every Wednesday and was very comfortable. However, when I would appear only occasionally, I would get up tight. When I went out of office, the Executive Committee presented me with an autographed rubber foot commemorating all the times I stuck my foot in my mouth. For example, I would say, “We need to have more and better relations with the Jaycettes”. Everyone would laugh until I realized the “foot and mouth disease” had stuck again.

As I was growing my current beard, I was surprised it came out white. My first talk was at the Governor’s Conference on Tourism in Nashville. My introduction was “Here comes Santa Claus”. Was it Abe Lincoln or Mark Twain who said “To ease tensions a speaker should picture the audience naked.” I spoke to the Ostomy Association and told them that as I look out, all I could see was a bunch of pouches.

One of the biggest or most important speeches after retirement was the big patriotic annual meeting in Gaston, AL. The Chamber of Commerce and all the civic clubs sponsored this. Gaston, like Chattanooga is a very patriotic city. More than 500 attended. After Lloyd Wagnon, talked me into this, I learned that most of the previous speakers had been Generals. I tried to escape. I told Lloyd to do it (he was a B-25 pilot with more missions than me). I suggested the Committee Chairman do it (he was Operations Officer in the 8th Air Force; it was the outfit where Joe Kennedy died, the one who was slated to be president.) Nobody would let me off the hook.

Knowing I couldn’t compete with all these heroes, I tried humor. I commended them for having a sergeant speak, and then told them how I was accused of shooting down one of our own bombers. The audience was very gracious. The next year, the principal speaker was the pilot of the Memphis Belle (the first American Bomber to complete 25 missions). I suspect the folks in Gaston wanted him before but settled for me. I would like to hear him speak as well. I saw the movie.

Let me remind you that: 1) I am shy and 2) I hate to make speeches, however these experiences should convince you that I won’t let my shyness keep me from telling my story. I am not a good speaker, but I have made hundreds of speeches. If I can, so can YOU! Don’t look for excuses, just do it. What are we afraid of?

BEING ON TELEVISION

I was introduced to television on Chattanooga’s first TV station, WDEF-TV (Channel 12); it was on Point of View with George Conner as the emcee for The Adult Education Council. I was on several times with subjects, such as: comic books, pornography, etc. Point of View is still on the air after all these years. TV was new in Chattanooga in the early fifties, and we would take pictures to show that we had been on television.

When WRGP-TV, Channel 3 came on the air, I was on the Health Council’s program. Tom Willett, an announcer held up a sign saying, “Your zipper is down”. It wasn’t, but I believed him and kept my hand over my fly. The TV crew helped me to get even with Tom. They tried several tricks, but what finally broke him up was a cameraman sticking a carrot out of his fly and another cameraman with a butcher knife to whack it. Tom broke up in the middle of a commercial.

I got used to being on TV appearing occasionally on “Jaycee Question of the Week”. This was a great tool for Jaycee civic work.

Bettye’s first TV appearance was on Drue Smith’s program the day I was named Chattanooga Young Man of the Year of 1956, presented by Senator Estes Kefauver. Drue would ask Bettye a question and then turn to the Senator before she could answer. Bettye was on TV a lot later on and she was very poised.

Channel 9, WTVC, was Chattanooga’s third TV station. They kept a tape of everyone’s faux paux’s. After I had been doing Backyard Safari for eight or ten years, I was taping a promotional spot and ended, “Be sure to tune in Channel 3 Sunday”. The brass from Channel 9 happened to be in the control room. Everyone poured into the studio saying, “Channel 3??????” I am sure their tapes of faux pauxs had a lot more of my goofs.

The toughest interviews however, were for TV news. The time limitations, editing, etc sometimes made it difficult to get your message across. I had a great crew for Backyard Safari. They really took good care of me. They had a better view of my women guests; they would hold up a sign for me saying, “Pink” Thus I would know my guest had pink panties. Think about this, ladies, the next time you are on TV.

When the Jaycees advocated the annexation of East Ridge, John Stophel, was president. Since our position was based on finances and John was a CPA and had not done an audit, I was drafted as spokesman because I was Past President. The Jaycee committee approved every news release. The newspaper articles were fine. The TV interviews, however, seemed stronger than we intended. This is when I learned: 1) the power of television and 2) East Ridge politics could be treacherous. I received phone threats, some at two in the morning; treats on my life, my wife’s life and even my children. Annexation fights always get emotional, don’t they?

HAVING YOUR PICTURE MADE

Some people are photogenic. Some are not. Some people strike natural poses. Some freeze and just look like they are posing for pictures. You probably have your favorite photos and others you wish were never taken. Do you cut yourself out of some photos?

While you reminisce about your pictures, let me tell you about mine. Two of my favorite pictures were made by roving photographers – one when I was two in a knit suit in my rocking chair. The other when I was six, sitting on a pony (I remember because of the pony).

Since then I’ve been photographed hundreds, maybe thousands of times. The only pictures I liked were those where someone said something, or did something funny. That way, I had a natural smile. My wife could always have a natural smile, but that’s the actress in her.

While Jaycee President, I posed for one picture I lived to regret. It was at a National Convention in Los Angeles. I posed with “Miss Hollywood”. It was innocent enough since my wife was standing nearby, but it sure didn’t look innocent. I had a beer in my hand and was staring down the beauty queen’s bosom, with a natural smile – you might say, a gleam in my eye. We went on acting like convention delegates and forgot this event until the next year.

The following spring, I was presiding at the Jaycee’s weekly luncheon. Someone had a huge blow up of my infamous picture on a poster labeled “President Bob Views the Grand Canyon”. This was hilarious, but the program that day was given by Dr. Lee Roberson, pastor of Chattanooga’s largest church. It was downright embarrassing.

Two or three years later, I was in Knoxville, playing in a state-wide softball tournament. We picked up a player from Cleveland whom I didn’t know. He told me, “I have a picture of you”. It was the same picture. He said that he was painting a Shell Service Station in Cleveland and “it was on the drop cloth”. He didn’t know why but he picked it up.

Later, I seriously considered running for political office. I never did, but, if I had you know that picture would have popped up, probably on the front page of the newspaper. The moral of this story is to be careful how you are photographed!!!!!

Think a minute about your photos. Dig them out and organize them. While you are at it, you may want to date them and write all the names down before you forget them. Oh, you’ve already forgotten? Anyway, you will probably find some pictures to share with others and some you will want to burn.

We have thousands of pictures of friends and family. Less than 1% are identified. What a shame! What a waste! Why don’t you resolve now to get your pictures organized. Don’t be stupid like Bob Elmore! With today’s digital cameras, you can shoot so many pictures easily, you are bound to get some good ones. Will you delete the others?

(This is an excerpt from Bob Elmore's new book, "A Funny Thing Happened on My Way to the National Cemetery." The book is $10 in softback, $20 in hardback. Copies are available at the Bicentennial Library downtown, Wally's (on McCallie), Senior Neighbors, The Racket Club and the Brainerd Trophy Shop. All proceeds, not just profits, go to the Chattanooga Area Historical Association. For more information, call 629-1366)