Chattanooga’s Live Music Scene – The Propofol Shuffle

Friday, July 12, 2013 - by Bob Payne
Bob Payne
Bob Payne
- photo by The Doctor

It’s been 5 years, so this week I got to go in for my colonoscopy again. Time flies when you are having fun, but nothing like it does under the influence of Michael Jackson’s favorite drug – Propofol. That is the stuff they give you, via IV, in the operating room, right before they perform a colonoscopy. 

About 1 in 20 Americans will develop colorectal cancer in their lifetime. 140,000 cases are diagnosed each year and those result in 49,000 deaths. It is the third most common cancer and one of the most preventable. 49,000 deaths. That is more than the combined total of persons dying from murder, shark attacks, car accidents, and dinosaur related deaths.

Doctors recommend a colonoscopy starting at age 50 every 10 years. If they find some polyps during a colonoscopy, they usually remove them at the same time and then the recommendation changes to once every five years. You have to renew your driver’s license more often than that, and you don’t even have to go to the DMV for a colonoscopy. If you have insurance, it will cover it according to the schedule your doctor prescribes, usually at 100%.

The worst part of a colonoscopy is not the procedure – that’s pretty much the fun part, as you are knocked out cold while your doctor plays roto-rooter man. No, the worst part is drinking the weird stuff they give you the night before the procedure. It is designed to clean out your system so roto-rooter man can see with his tiny camera. Just stay close to the bathroom the night before and all will be fine.

On the day of the procedure, you will report to the hospital or clinic and a whole bunch of people will ask you if you followed the rules and had nothing to eat or drink after midnight. Assuming you did as instructed, they will inject you with some Profolol and within seconds you will be out like a light. About 20 minutes later, you will wake up and once you can tell the nurse your name and who won the 1956 World Series, you can go home. You have to have someone drive you out of there, as you may be a bit groggy for a few hours. In my case, I went home and took a nice nap and then went and judged the Texaco Country Showcase that evening at Rhythm & Brews. No big deal, and I get to live a while longer without colorectal cancer to get in my way.

If you are 50 and haven’t had a colonoscopy, talk to your doctor about getting one. It doesn’t have to be that bad – make a fun day of it. This year, I asked my doctor to be sure and tell Pat that he didn’t find my head in there anywhere, as I have been accused of having it there on more than one occasion. I even bragged to my friend Bruce that I got to have one Wednesday and he didn’t. He was quite jealous, too, as he also enjoys his colonoscopies.

There is lots of fun stuff to do in Chattanooga this weekend, including the Beaters 150th anniversary reunion at Rhythm & Brews tonight. Queen Lightning is at Buds, tonight. Toad the Wet Sprocket is at Track 29 tonight, but tomorrow’s Old Crow Medicine Show is sold out. Soul Survivor is at Sugars BBQ Downtown both nights. Megan Jean and the KFB is JJ’s Bohemia on Saturday Night, and one of my new favorites, Rag Doll, is at Bud’s Sportsbar on Saturday night. Don’t forget Nightfall tonight and the Chattanooga Market on Sunday! I can do all of those things, and I had a colonoscopy 48 hours ago, so you have no excuse. With a little luck, I'll be able to them for many years to come, too!

For local music info, try www.chattanoogaentertainers.com or www.chattanooganightscope.com. They both have great local music info and schedules. For local info on Country music, try Jim Boles’ site www.chattacountry.ning.com.

Email Bob Payne at davrik2000@yahoo.com or catch him on Facebook at www.facebook.com/davrik2000.



Keith And Kristin Getty In Concert Oct. 28 At Memorial Auditorium

In celebration of the 500th anniversary of the Reformation, several local churches will be hosting Keith and Kristyn Getty in concert with their current tour, Facing a Task Unfinished, on Saturday, Oct. 28 at Memorial Auditorium at 7 p.m. They will be accompanied by a multi-church choir.  "This Oct. 31 will mark 500 years since Martin Luther, nailed his 95 theses on the ... (click for more)

Music At St. Paul's Announces 2017-2018 Season

Music at St. Paul’s announces its 2017-18 Artist Series season presenting five concerts featuring renowned chamber vocal, and chamber ensembles, many performing in Chattanooga for the first time. Season subscriptions and single tickets may be purchased in advance through the St. Paul’s website. Tickets for each concert will also be sold at the door. For tickets and more information, ... (click for more)

State Comptroller Says More Control Over Spending Needed At CVB

The state Comptroller’s Office is recommending the Chattanooga Convention and Visitors Bureau (CVB) board of directors take steps to adopt detailed policies concerning how the CVB spends its money.   The Comptroller’s Office has completed a review of Hamilton County’s hotel/motel taxes which are all forwarded to the CVB. The annual report is required by Public Chapter ... (click for more)

County Commission Votes 7-2 For Rezoning For C&D Landfill At Harrison

The County Commission on Wednesday voted 7-2 to approve rezoning for a Construction and Debris landfill at Harrison.  Voting in favor were Greg Beck, Warren Mackey, Sabrena Smedley, Greg Martin, Tim Boyd, Randy Fairbanks and Jim Fields.   Opposed were Chester Bankston and Joe Graham.  Commissioner Boyd said it was just the first step in permitting for ... (click for more)

Trump - And Response

Hardly a day, even a moment, goes by when some news flash appears sharing what  Trump  said or did. Not catchy and cute as we might feel when we see the baby turn over for the first time or say Da, da. Instead, this grown man and our president defies child cooing and smiling and instead frowns amid growing anger that we voted for this man, a grown up not quite potty-trained.  ... (click for more)

Roy Exum: New Schools On Agenda

Hamilton County School Superintendent Bryan Johnson confirmed on Wednesday that a plan for several new public schools will be included on Thursday night’s School Board agenda. Hamilton County has fallen woefully behind other metro school districts in the state and, with an estimated $340 million in deferred repairs, upgrading facilities - that now average over 40 years old - was ... (click for more)