A wonderful friend sent me the copy of a personality test that television’s Dr. Phil (McGraw) just gave to television’s Oprah Winfrey. It’s easy to do, only asks 10 questions and is often used by various Human Relations departments to gauge a potential hire. So get a pad and a pencil and take the test. (Believe it or not, some companies pay big bucks for quizzes like this.)
I am fascinated by zany stuff like this because no matter if I find out that I am really a bald Eskimo who has HD/AD disorder and can’t catch a fish, it makes my life a little more fun. The idea is for you to answer each multiple-choice question as honestly as you can without peeking at the answers. You will find the answers right under the 10th question. Add up your total points and then, based on your total, you can read Dr. Phil’s conclusions.
Remember – all the interpretations are general and make you wonder who comes up with this stuff Then again, you might learn something new about yourself. For the record, Dr. Phil scored 58 (duh, I think he wrote it), Oprah scored 38, and I scored a 44. And did you know that Dr. Phil played college football for Tulsa. The year he signed his scholarship, linebacker Phil McGraw and his teammates suffered a whipping against Houston, losing 100-6.
Whatever. Let’s see how you do …
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1. WHEN DO YOU FEEL YOUR BEST …
A) in the morning
B) during the afternoon and early evening
C) late at night
2. YOU USUALLY WALK …
A) fairly fast, with long steps
B) fairly fast, with little steps
C) less fast head up, looking the world in the face
D) less fast, head down
E) very slowly
3. WHEN TALKING TO PEOPLE, YOU …
A) stand with your arms folded
B) have your hands clasped
C) have one or both your hands on your hips
D) touch or push the person to whom you are talking
E) play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair
4. WHEN RELAXING YOU SIT WITH …
A) your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
B) your legs crossed
C) your legs stretched out or straight
D) one leg curled under you
5. WHEN SOMETHING REALLY AMUSED YOU …
A) big appreciated laugh
B) a laugh, but not a loud one
C) a quiet chuckle
D) a sheepish smile
6. WHEN YOU GO TO A PARTY OF A SOCIAL GATHERING YOU …
A) make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
B) make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
C) make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed
7. YOU’RE WORKING VERY HARD, CONCENTRATING HARD AND YOU ARE INTERRUPTED, YOU…
A) welcome the break
B) feel extremely irritated
C) vary between these two extremes
8. WHICH OF THE FOLLLOWING COLORS DO YOU LIKE THE MOST …
A) Red or orange
C) yellow or light blue
E) dark blue or purple
G) brown or gray
9. WHEN YOU ARE IN BED AT NIGHT, IN THOSE LAST FEW MOMENTS BEFORE GOING TO SLEEP, YOU ARE USUALLY …
A) stretched out on your back
B) stretched out face down on your stomach
C) on your side, slightly curled
D) with your head on one arm
E) with your head under the covers
10. YOU OFTEN DREAM THAT YOU ARE ….
B) fighting or struggling
C) searching for something or somebody
D) flying or floating
E) you usually have dreamless sleep
F) your dreams are always pleasant
* * *
1. (a) 2 (b) 4 (c) 6
2. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 7 (d) 2 (e) 1
3. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 5 (d) 7 (e) 6
4. (a) 4 (b) 6 (c) 2 (d) 1
5. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 2
6. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 2
7. (a) 6 (b) 2 (c) 4
8. (a) 6 (b) 7 (c) 5 (d) 4 (e) 3 (f) 2 (g) 1
9. (a) 7 (b) 6 (c) 4 (d) 2 (e ) 1
10 (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 6 (f) 1
Now, add up your total points and see how Dr. Phil interprets them.
* * *
OVER 60 POINTS: Others see you as someone they should "handle with care." You're seen as vain, self-centered, and extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don't always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.
51 TO 60 POINTS: Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality, a natural leader, who's quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once, someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate.
41 TO 50 POINTS: Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting, someone who's constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding, someone who'll always cheer them up and help them out.
31 TO 40 POINTS: Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful and practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expects the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you, realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.
21 TO 30 POINTS: Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then, usually decide against it. They think this reaction is caused partly by your careful nature.
UNDER 21 POINTS: People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions and who doesn't want to get involved with anyone or anything! They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don't exist. Some people think you're boring. Only those who know you well, know that you aren't.
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Finally, this is hardly a standardized or any part of the core curriculum. It is just for laughs. And, no, you don’t have to turn in your test before the bell rings.