Formulating Successful Students: Listen To Your Children

Tuesday, April 08, 2014 - by Lisa A. Di Rosso

It is undeniable that we would like our children to be “Straight-A” students.  A popular belief is that full concentration on schoolwork along with disciplined study habits is the winning combination for academic achievement.  Parents often lecture their children to study harder and they will acquire the key that opens the proverbial door of success.  Barking such orders as a means for ensuring a child’s scholastic achievement is not the equivalent of effective parental guidance. 

It seems as though many parents just don’t take the time and/or have the patience to get thoroughly involved and listen, really listen, to their children.  This is a skill that parents must practice in order to increase effective parenting.  Adults are only human and carry their own problems, issues, and faults.  However, every effort must be made to avoid passing paralyzing burdens onto their children.  A lousy day at the office is not an acceptable excuse for unconstructive criticism and verbal abuse that many children, teenagers, and young adults endure time and time again.  “Power trips” executed by adults for no other reason than because they simply can only serve to chip away a child’s self-esteem.  This behavior is counterproductive and detrimental to overall development and achievement.

While attending high school and college I had met a number of peers who seemed considerably intelligent, developed good study habits, and possessed excellent memory recall abilities.  Nevertheless, I noticed that the majority of them did not accelerate educationally to the same degree as the small remaining percentage had.   I frequently pondered what particular influence gave these few students an edge to cause them to excel in leaps and bounds over the others.  I eventually uncovered the influential factor that I had previously overlooked. 

Throughout observation and personal insight into several of the high-achievers’ home lives, the missing link was found:  Their environments were extremely conducive to promoting well-rounded, successfully-educated people.  I witnessed first-hand the interaction that took place between these students and their respective parents.  The freedom to express ideas in an atmosphere of mutual respect was the prominent component I noticed.  These parents listened to what their children had to say and valued the intended messages conveyed.  Individual views were appreciated, considered, and encouraged.  Achievements were consistently praised.  Importantly, conscious effort was made to alleviate as much unnecessary stress from life as possible, allowing undistracted full potential to surface.  Education was a collective family effort, a unified investment that proved to yield great rewards.  As a result, these students appeared confident, optimistic, and well-spoken.  Seemingly high levels of self-esteem were noted within this group.

Successfully educating our children is a compilation of variables including academic abilities, self-discipline, and environments that effectively promote learning in both school and home.  It is vital that the two-way door of communication is permanently opened.  Parents must do more than talk.  They must willingly get out of the spotlight and take more than the basic amount of time to be able to listen attentively. 

When we nurture, support, respect, and listen to our children, positive self-esteem flourishes and the belief in unlimited potential allows for its reality.  When combined with the omission of nonsensical stressors and distractors we build so much more than immensely successful students.   As a result, we generate happy, secure, and productive members of society.



Send Your Opinions To Chattanoogan.com

We welcome your opinions at Chattanoogan.com. Email to news@chattanoogan.com . We require your real first and last name and contact information. There is no word limit, but if your article is too long you may lose your reader. Please focus more on issues than personal attacks. (click for more)

Not Everything Has Been Done To Save Hutcheson

I am a resident of Walker County and I have a personal belief that a hospital ranks equal to other basic services a community should offer (like police, fire, emergency services, school systems, government, etc.). I am not privy to all the management and financial conundrums concerning the feasibility of maintaining and growing Hutcheson, and as a private citizen I don’t believe ... (click for more)

Additions And Improvements At Camp Jordan Arena Coming Soon

Additions and improvements are coming to Camp Jordan Arena in the near future. At the Thursday night meeting of the East Ridge city council, approval was given for buying new playground equipment. It will come from Gametime, a locally-based company. The VP of Marketing lives in East Ridge and made a proposal to set up the playground at Camp Jordan so his company could use it for ... (click for more)

Teenager Killed In ATV Accident Thursday Night

Damon Lee Jones, 15, was killed Thursday night in an ATV accident in Walker County. It was reported he was riding with a 17-year old, when they tried to enter a church parking lot, but ran into a cable barrier. The accident happened on Dunwoody Road in LaFayette. The other rider, identified as Timothy J. Wallin, was not injured.   (click for more)

Freeman-Led Owls Whip Cleveland, 30-14, To Win 5-AAA Title

Junior Rashun Freeman's stunning versatility stole the show Friday night. Freeman caught a touchdown pass, returned a punt for a second score and had one of three Ooltewah interceptions as the fourth-ranked Owls whipped Cleveland, 30-14, to win the District 5-AAA championship in front of a near-capacity crowd at James N. Monroe Stadium. “I practice hard and that shows ... (click for more)

Baylor Beats Father Ryan For D-II State Volleyball Title

MURFREESBORO, Tenn. – Friday was a magical day for the Baylor Lady Red Raider volleyball team. Facing arch-rival Father Ryan for the fourth time this season, Baylor evened the score at 2-2, but the last time at Siegel High School was the sweetest as it came in the championship match of the D-II Class AA state tournament. Father Ryan had a huge group of students in its ... (click for more)