Pie Slinger’s – Eat Big

Tuesday, June 03, 2014 - by Willie Mae
Pie Slingers 'Kitchen Sink' Pie
Pie Slingers 'Kitchen Sink' Pie

It was good to have my partner in crime Lois with me once again. Things for ol’ Phil have been looking up and Lois believes she can get out with me on occasion.

Someone told me they wanted me to try Pie Slinger’s at 2535 Battlefield Parkway, but neither Lois nor I knew that area very well and we had to use the navigator system in my car to find it.

My son Jack wanted me to have a car with a navigating system to help me, but I don’t know how to work those things very well and, with it pouring down rain, I knew it would be a challenge. The voice-in-the-box told us our destination was on the right, but it was a schoolhouse. I thought maybe the voice box got it wrong by a smidgen so I drove a little further to find it.

Lois helped me to look, but we did not find it. I did see a Japanese place I told her we could try out if we didn’t find what we were looking for and I turned the car around and drove back down the Parkway. We still didn’t see it and, when my car beeped that I was out of gas, Lois panicked and told me I better get gas right away.

With the downpour, I planned to get just enough gas to get us there and back home. While at the pump, lightning struck right above me and, even though I was standing under a shelter, I felt I had enough gas.

We headed back down the Parkway to find the Japanese place but then we couldn’t find it! I turned around once again and I pulled into a shopping center to turn around. Just then Lois said, “Pie Slingers… what kind of name is that?!”

I shouted, “That’s where we are supposed to go! That’s the place I was trying to find!”

I was so glad we found it. I am sure it isn’t as hard to find on a beautiful day. When we walked in, a nice boy gave us a paper menu and we ordered a large pizza called “The Kitchen Sink”. I guess it had everything on it.

We helped ourselves at the drink counter and sat at a booth with a glass table top. My ol’ eyes played a trick on me as I tried to set my drink down. I thought I was about to place my cup on a small picture frame that someone had left on the table, but under the glass were small trinkets and memorabilia displayed like a shadow box.

When I giggled and told Lois I thought I was about to set my cup on the tiny frame she said, “Go ahead and set it there, it’s a coaster.”

The booth felt funny to me. If I sat back, my behind sank in the seat, my feet couldn’t reach the floor and I couldn’t reach the table. Lois looked a little squished behind the table and I realized that some big ol’ boy must have sat on my side and needed more room. We tried to scoot the table closer to me and finally it was just right.

While we waited for our pie I saw a sign on the wall that read, ‘Take the Behemoth Challenge’. It was a 28-inch, 10-pound pizza and two people had to eat it in 30 minutes and it would be free (or they got a gift card for a free pizza or something like that). I couldn’t see the whole sign from our seat, but I thought that was pretty clever. I knew that even though we were hungry after all that driving, we could not eat that big!

Our Kitchen Sink arrived and I helped myself to two pieces and Lois only got one. I knew my limit would be two pieces and I just went ahead and got what I wanted. The crust was probably my favorite part of the whole sink!

Lois is a slow eater and she took a while to eat her first piece. She really liked it and had NO complaints! I had already finished my two pieces and I was stuffed to the gills as I whispered ‘whee-ee-doggie’. Lois wanted a second piece, but didn’t want to look like a big eater so she tried to get me to get another piece just so she wouldn’t feel guilty for getting another piece. I said, “No ma’am, I have had my two – you get your second piece, I don’t mind waiting.”

So she helped herself to another piece. I waited for Lois to finish her pie and then we boxed up the rest to take to Phil. We were as full as a tick. We decided that the two pieces we had were rather large and were probably more than we were used to.  

When we got in the car and I turned the voice-box back on to get us two old ladies home on a dark and rainy night and it told us to turn on “Diets” Road. Lois snickered at the mispronunciation of “Dietz” (Deets) Road and asked, “Is she trying to tell us something?”

And it was just after that when she quipped, “Wanna stop and get dessert?” Welcome back, Lois.

Hours:
11:00 am – 9:00 pm



The Gourmet Gala Brings Chattanooga’s Top Restaurants Together To Mingle, Taste And Bid For Stronger, Healthier Babies

The annual March of Dimes Gourmet Gala will be on Saturday, from 6-9 p.m. at Track 29. Event chairs are Jarrett and Leigh Ann Millsaps. This fundraising event offers 400 guests the opportunity to sample fare from some of the area's best restaurants, mingle with local celebrity chefs, taste wines and spirits, and bid on an impressive array of auction items. This evening, which ... (click for more)

Jersey Mike's Subs Opens In Hixson On Wednesday With Fundraiser

Jersey Mike’s Subs,   known for its fresh sliced/fresh grilled subs, will open in Hixson on Wednesday. Franchise owners Ryan Hendrix and Andrew Brooks, along with manager Jacob Lewis, will hold a grand opening and free sub fundraiser from   Wednesday to Sunday, Sept. 28, to support Hixson Elementary School. The new restaurant, at 5510 Highway 153,   ... (click for more)

Man Charged With Killing 3-Year-Old Takes Own Life In County Jail

Justin Dale Bradley died in the Hamilton County jail Saturday morning. Notification was received from the Hamilton County 911 Center at   12:50 a.m. ,   regarding an inmate found unresponsive.   Jail personnel found the male inmate unresponsive in his cell and initiated C.P.R. while notifying Hamilton County Emergency Medical Services. ... (click for more)

Democratic Chairman Roy Herron Announces He Will Not Run For 2nd Term

Democratic Party Chairman Roy Herron announced Saturday at a meeting of the Tennessee Democratic Party State Executive Committee that he would not be seeking a second term as party chairman. “I have been blessed to serve as chairman these past two years, and I owe an enormous debt of gratitude to all of the executive committee members, party officials, staff members, and friends ... (click for more)

You’re Right With Lamar

One of Tennessee’s favorite sons, Davy Crockett, coined an oft-used phrase:  “Be always sure you’re right, then go ahead.” Being sure is quite important, but may be difficult in this election cycle. The Democratic nominee campaigning against Lamar Alexander is a man whose radio ads call for “change,” “fair” taxes and more jobs.  Sounds good, huh?   ... (click for more)

Roy Exum: The Saturday Funnies

Okay … here we go. A number of readers have complained that I haven’t shared any jokes that my friends send to my email address so on a weekend when our Volunteers and Mocs are idle, let’s laugh a little:   I was sitting in a bar one afternoon with an old friend knocking back a few beers when he said, "You know, if we're not careful we'll end up like those two old drunks ... (click for more)