Why I Am Thankful, 2015

  • Thursday, November 26, 2015
  • Roy Exum
Roy Exum
Roy Exum

I can’t really remember when I first started this – sometime in the 1970s – but my favorite column every year comes during Thanksgiving when I literally pause and use my fingers to thank God for all His richest blessings. The year 2015 has been bountiful so here are just a few of the things I will carry in my heart as I take my place at today’s table:

I AM THANKFUL that tomorrow, on a “Black Friday” that is said to be the biggest shopping day of the year, the giant outdoors outfitter, REI Co-Op, is shuttering its doors and windows, giving every employee a full day of pay, and telling them to get outdoors and get a full breath of America. There is far more that matters than 20 percent off on tent stakes. Bravo.

I AM THANKFUL that the three honorees at the “Dinner of Distinction,” held each year by the Erlanger Hospital Foundation, will be Dr. Larry Sargent, Dr. John McCravey and community cheerleader Grady Williams. Talk about three winning cards to find in your hand! The dinner will be January 15, 2016 at the Chattanoogan Hotel.

I AM THANKFUL that somebody pointed out that in every beautiful painting and museum masterpiece ever done of Adam and Eve, both of them have belly buttons. Think about that.  If that is over your head, back to biology tutorials you go.

I AM THANKFUL for what King Oehmig, Wig Robinson, Scotty Probasco and Hardwick Caldwell meant to me and how each helped shape my life. You can do that to somebody, too, you know.

I AM THANKFUL for the brilliance of Sebastian S. Kresge, the guy who developed a chain of 85 “five-and-dime” stores by 1912. Once in a speech at Harvard, he said only six words and his business lesson is as true today as it was over 100 years ago: “I never made a dime – talking.” (You’ll have to ask your grandparents what a ‘five and dime’ store was.)

I AM THANKFUL that a bumblebee has no idea whatsoever that, according to aerodynamic principles, it is impossible for one to fly. Do you realize what each of us could achieve if we knew there was no way to fail?

I AM THANKFUL that I got to see, as a live witness, the way our community – and I am including those from Georgia, Alabama and small towns all the way to Knoxville – responded when five members of our armed forces were killed by a terrorist here in July. I hope to live a bit longer but if I were to croak tomorrow, that is my favorite picture of this land I so dearly love.

I AM THANKFUL that football coach Russ Huesman has established such a winning program at UTC and that he braved the age-old adage only the dumbest coaches ever sign their own son. Had he not, Jacob Huesman would not be taking the Mocs into the NCAA playoffs this Saturday as the most prolific quarterback in the university’s history. The kid was awarded the Southern Conference ‘Offensive Player of the Year’ three years straight. How dumb is that?

I AM THANKFUL that Whoopi Goldberg came up with the line, "Normal is just a cycle on the washing machine."

I AM THANKFUL that Witold Waszczykowski, the Foreign Minister of Poland, came up with the idea that every country that accepts Syrian refugees should immediately train the men to fight so they can go back and liberate their homeland. What’s possibly better than that?

I AM THANKFUL that everyone knows one of the greatest songs ever was Kate Smith's "God Bless America." It was written by Irving Berlin but very few know that Kate and Irving made a deal before she ever sang it for the first time. The two agreed neither would take a penny -- this due to the fierce patriotism of 1940 -- and that all proceeds would instead go to the Boy Scouts. Many millions later, royalties from the song still do!

I AM THANKFUL when my puppy died this summer, some anonymous person sent me a card -- which I still have -- that read: "It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them and every new dog gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enough all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are."

I AM THANKFUL for a lot of butter on anything.

I AM THANKFUL Chattanooga is recognizing the immediate need for a new Children’s Hospital and for the fact the proposed connector linking Amnicola Highway and Central Avenue will shave minutes off an ambulance’s arrival to the emergency room when every single second counts.

I AM THANKFUL for the sage wisdom of author Chase LeBlanc: "If you wish to drive a car successfully it requires most attention forward - with a few quick glances to the side and at the rearview mirror - Successfully driving your life is the same."

I AM THANKFUL for what Donnie Hutcherson did as the chairman of Erlanger’s Trustees, of the leadership Charlie Arant gave to our Aquarium, and Jim Winslett at the Better Business Bureau is pretty sporty too.

I AM THANKFUL the great John Guerry just joined his sons in the Sewanee Sports Hall of Fame and I figure his father would be most delighted. After all, he is most famous as the Vice Chancellor at the University of the South.

I AM THANKFUL I was sitting in the office of the legendary Auburn football coach Shug Jordan and he told me about the time he was offered a job at Sewanee. “I had a wonderful interview with the Vice Chancellor and he told me he was pretty sure I’d get the call. So I told him to get the big guy and we’d strike a deal. “Mr. Jordan, the ‘big guy’ here is God Almighty.’ By the time they could get all the details worked out Auburn had gotten in touch with me and that was that. But I never forgot the lesson!”

I AM THANKFUL that before any Episcopal priest can graduate from Sewanee, he must come to grips and accept fully that sometimes, no matter what you do or how hard you pray, things are not going to work out.

I AM THANKFUL that Jon Meacham, whose new book, “Destiny and Power: the American Odyssey of George Herbert Walker Bush,” is a run-away best seller, this despite Jon admitting his best friend at the University of the South was Jack Daniels. (Jon was once a writer for the Chattanooga Times after going to McCallie. He has also been awarded the Pulitzer Prize.)

I AM THANKFUL that anyone who makes less than $50,000 can get their taxes done for free. That’s right. Free. Just call 2-1-1 or 3-1-1 and find out about an IRS-sponsored program called Volunteer Income Tax Assistance (VITA).

I AM THANKFUL that just before “Dutch” Van Kirk died, the navigator of the famous Enola Gay bomber – it dropped the atomic bomb on Japan -- was invited to speak at a grammar school, but when a young teacher announced he was a hero from “World War Eleven” (WWII) the man walked out without saying a word. My goodness, how we need to renew American history and – yes – civics in our schools...

I AM THANKFUL for political races where there is no way we can lose. Sterling Jetton is facing County Commissioner Marty Haynes in the Republic Party for the Hamilton County Tax Assessor in March and both are great guys. I am assured Randy Johnston, a third Republican candidate who just announced, is too, so whoever is picked to follow the delightful Bill Bennett will be a “winner” in more ways than one.

I AM THANKFUL I heard UTC team doctor Bill Moore Smith when he talked about running back Derrick Crane. “It is this simple – Derrick is the finest kid in America. He is a good football player but everybody who ever comes in contact with him leaves knowing he’s extra-special.”

I AM THANKFUL that today – and only today – everybody in America adores plump thighs.

I AM THANKFUL for the people who wait until the Thanksgiving dishes are cleared before they allow any member of the family to haul the Christmas decorations out. Thanksgiving is far too meaningful and way too special to ever let Christmas get ahead of it.

I AM THANKUL that Criminal Court Judge Tom Greenholtz is the chairman of the board at Orange Grove Center and that he succeeded Hamilton County District Attorney Neal Pinkston. Do you have any idea what such men mean to our city! My goodness! And what a fabulous job Bill Killian has done as our federal district attorney before he stepped down last week.

I AM THANKFUL for John Wilson’s book on railroads in Chattanooga. I thought it was kind of a reach when I first heard about it, but that was before I sat down with it and became mesmerized. The history lessons are just delightful, too. (Copies can be bought at Zarzour’s Restaurant.)

I AM THANKFUL that when my children and grandchildren were here last weekend to help Jordan McCarter and Keith Becklin celebrate their wedding, I can never remember a time when all of them looked as happy and as wonderful. Glory.

I AM THANKUL there are people on Signal Mountain who realize how much some $85,000 “message board” will junk up the place. An example: drive up Highway 27 and you’ll see there are no billboards through the gorgeous countryside until you get to Soddy-Daisy. The contrast is astounding. Signal Mountain and any other town in America needs a message board about as much as the Ebola disease. (Hint: text, twitter, email, cell phone …. Please! Tell the carpet-bagger to keep his ugly sign.)

I AM THANKFUL for people like Dr. Dan Stanley, Ralph Potter, JoAnne Foreman, Manny Rico, Jeff Messenger, Mickey Spence, Auburn-bound Emma Beach, Jennifer Lawrence, Lane McClurd, John Dalm, Elizabeth Zackary, Dr. Nita Shumaker, Rev. Tim Tinsley, Ed Emerson, the great Phyllis Miller, Dr. Jeremy Bruce, Betty Emerson and every client at Orange Grove. These people have only one thing in common, that I love them each and every one.

I AM THANKFUL for the sage belief: “Free people are not equal. Equal people are not free.”

I AM THANKFUL every time I think of the young mother who had her in-laws come to spend Thanksgiving week and unknowingly cooked a ‘pregnant’ turkey. Get this: As the ladies were preparing the feast the day before, the young mother had to dash to the store for a last-minute ingredient. She asked her witty mother-in-law to fill the bird with the stuffing she had already prepared. While she was gone, the older lady found a Cornish game hen in the freezer. So she stuffed the tiny bird but identical fowl inside the big bird and then packed the rest of the cavity with luscious dressing. The next day, after the family had returned home from church, she watched her daughter-in-law spoon out the dressing and you’ll just have to imagine what happened when the Cornish game hen was finally discovered. Lord have mercy!

I AM THANKUL when people hit home runs, make 3-point shots, pin their opponent, finish first in their age group, make a hole-in-one, win their heat, dominate the third set, score a touchdown in overtime and throw a “participation” trophy in the river. There has to be a best, a second place, and a last place, if ever we are to truly learn the greatest lessons. We keep score in life for the only reason that it inspires us to constantly strive to get better.

I AM THANKFUL for two of the dearest friends in my neighborhood – police chief Randy Bowden and my beloved high school teammate, Jim Cooper. What better two cards to draw from!

I AM THANKFUL for Thanksgiving dinner with Bob McKamey, Lynn and their families. And if you think that’s a hoot, wait ‘til the Christmas feast – you eat so much you want to do the dog trick -- circle three times and lie down to go to sleep!!

I AM THANKFUL for the guy, right after his wife had shaken him awake to tell him he was snoring too loudly, who replied: “I was dreaming I was a motorcycle.”

I AM THANKFUL for my favorite Democrat – Calvin Grant – and my favorite Republican – Johnny Holden. I could listen to either one of them for eight hours straight. And they are always right!

I AM THANKFUL for the blessed hour I had with my brother Jonathan the day before he died in late summer. He could no longer speak but every time he rolled his eyes it spoke volumes. I am the luckiest guy who ever lived.

I AM THANKFUL for Skittles at a picture show and wild cherry Lifesavers in a funeral or listening to a sermon. “A bit of sweet makes the message complete.”

I AM THANKFUL as I grow older I can remember what it is like to go 150 miles an hour in a “balanced” Corvette, to fly over 2 million miles all over the world as a frequent flyer, to sleep under the moon on a summer night in southern England, to escape a hot sauna in Helsinki and lay bare naked in the fresh-fallen snow, and to eat a Hebrew National hot dog from a street vendor on Park Avenue while a live model, a stunning redhead, was sitting in a window of a lingerie store wearing a green silk brassiere and matching panties. More mustard please!

I AM THANKFUL for the undisputed truth that one hour on a 75-horsepower John Deere with a Bush Hog can do more for a man’s peace of mind than any prescription drug that was ever compounded.

I AM THANKUL any time a military unit deploys and when they come back, some little kid screams “Daddy,” breaks away from her mom and tackles her now-weeping father. How special is that?

I AM THANKFUL for the most meaningful word in the English language: Benign.

I AM THANKFUL for every email sent to me. Because of the volume, there is no way for me to answer them but I try to read every one, learn from them, and they truly make me better. Thank you so much.

I AM THANKFUL for Melody Beattie’s view: “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

I AM THANKFUL that just if you want to make today a touch more special, jot a note to somebody for whom you are especially thankful, mail it with a postage stamp – no email – and two days later, walk out in your yard at night and look at all the stars. This I promise -- the brightest star of all will belong to you. Blessings.

Happy Thanksgiving.

royexum@aol.com

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