Roy Exum
As a rule I don’t stay up until after midnight on New Year’s Eve. I usually go to sleep early on Christmas Eve, too. Another of my foibles is I never watch election returns – it always makes me too nervous and, as the late Satchel Paige once said, “jangles up the blood.” So when I got up for a minute just after 3 a.m. Wednesday and turned on the computer to learn what the American people had decided, so help me if I didn’t have a flashback to that never-to-be forgotten night at the 1980 Olympics when legendary sports announced Al Michaels screamed, “Do you believe in miracles! YES!”
Michaels, of course, was gasping over the Americans beating the Russians in hockey 36 years ago, but after the bitterest presidential election I can ever recall, I was dumbfounded to learn America’s backbone had finally strengthened to such a standard “enough is enough!” Personally, I believe both the Republican and Democratic parties are in shambles and every politician on either side of the aisle should realize the time has come, as they used to tell us on the elementary school playground, to “straighten up and fly right.”
What you just saw, aside from the most biased media coverage ever, was America’s white working class proving its mettle. The majority – quite frankly – is fed up with the minorities and, while the next few months will offer more of the totally unexpected, yesterday it was fun to be an American.
With that, here is a sampling of things that I have just read:
THE DEMOCRATS ARE EXTINCT IN THE SOUTH – Democrats now control 10 states and, if you take away the tiny New England crowd, the only blue state east of the Mississippi River is Illinois. In Kentucky, where the legislature has been controlled by the Democrats for over a century, the Republicans just laid claim to the state house. And the new Governor in the Bluegrass State is Matt Bevin – R, who won by over 60 percent of the vote. Republican governors also won in Vermont, Missouri and Indiana.
THE ONE WORD REASONS – If the Democrats are asked to explain the loss in one word, they will offer “Comey,” as in FBI Director James. If the Republicans are asked to explain their sweeping success, they will say “Obama,” as in the imprint Barrack has left on the nation. If those who held their nose as they voted for Trump are asked: “Pence,” as in Trump vice president Mike.
THE RIPPLE EFFECT – Tennessee Governor Bill Haslam was adamant in not supporting Trump, as were some other leading Republicans, and a heavy dose of damage control has already begun. A key issue will be what Tennessee decides to do on health care because Obamacare is now on the ropes.
MUSLIMS AND MEXICANS – Both groups are quite on edge and, with the number of Muslims that Obama has put in high stations within the government, you hardly need to be a soothsayer to know major changes are coming.
PACK YOUR BAGS, BABY – Here is a partial list of those who have publicly stated that if Trump won, they would be moving to Canada: Neve Campbell, Cher, Miley Cyrus, Lena Dunham, Whoopi Goldberg, Chelsea Handler, Samuel L. Jackson, Spike Lee, George Lopez, Amber Rose, Amy Schumer, Al Sharpton, Jon Stewart, and Barbra Streisand. The Canadian island of Cape Breton, right off the coast of Maine, says on its website, "Don't wait until Donald Trump is elected president to find somewhere else to live! Start now, that way, on election day, you just hop on a bus to start your new life in Cape Breton, where women can get abortions, Muslim people can roam freely, and the only 'walls' are holding up the roofs of our extremely affordable houses.”
TO BECOME A CANADIAN RESIDENT, you have to have sponsorship from a family member or have skills that are in short supply to resettle permanently in Canada. Waiting times for permanent residency are about two years, even longer if you don't have a marketable skill. I’m thinking Al Sharpton will have a problem with that.
BIG WIN FOR MARIJUANA – Voters in California, Nevada and Massachusetts legalized the recreational use of marijuana, while Florida, Arkansas and North Dakota voted to allow pot for medical purposes. Recreational pot lost in Arizona and a recount was in Maine with the vote too close to call. It is now believed “Mary Jane” could win a national vote and federal changes in marijuana laws are almost assuredly on the way.
CONSERVATIVE ALLEN WEST offered this hours after the election: “"Let’s go forward as gracious, happy warriors with God’s grace and humility radiating in our countenance. And as we are faced with the ugliness of the liberal left, and their dismissive manner, stand strong, and know we have a greater mission."
GLEN BECK ON AMERICA RIGHT NOW -- “We don’t listen to each other and we don’t trust each other. I don’t think we’ve listened to each other at all, and I know I’ve been at fault on this.” And on the news media? “(The American people) view us as speaking down to them, pontificating, telling them and not listening to them.”
THE URBAN DICTIONARY – The word of the day on Wednesday was “Trumpence,” defined as “The punishment or fate a society deserves to receive.”
COLORADO LEGALIZED assisted suicide for the terminally ill who doctors believe have less than six months to live. The other five states that have “compassionate laws” are Oregon, Washington, Vermont, Montana and California.
TOUGHEST SHERIFF OUSTED -- Sheriff Joe Arpaio, of Arizona’s Maricopa County, was defeated Tuesday in his bid for a seventh consecutive term by his Democratic challenger, Paul Penzone, a 21-year veteran Phoenix police officer. Arpaio is 84 years old after serving for 24 years. “No longer will we be known by the notoriety of one,” Penzone said.
AN ELECTION OF FIRSTS -- Former Nevada attorney general Catherine Cortez Masto won a Senate race on Tuesday, defeating Rep. Joseph J. Heck (R-Nev.) in a close fight. She is the first Latina Senator in history, taking the retiring Harry Reid’s seat. Her win raises the number of Latinos in the Senate from three to four, including Senator Marco Rubio (R-Fla.), who retained his seat Tuesday, and Senators Ted Cruz (R-Tex.) and Robert Menendez (D-N.J.). In Congress, Darren Soto, a Democrat, became the first Puerto Rican to represent Florida in the House of Representatives, and Adriano Espaillat (D-N.Y.) was elected the first Dominican American to Congress.
PUERTO RICO JOINS U.S.? – Ricardo Rosello, a vivid supporter of statehood for Puerto Rico, won the governor's race on Tuesday after campaigning on a pledge to turn the economically troubled U.S. territory into the 51st state during his term.
ON MONDAY AFTERNOON before the election, devout Christian and former Heisman winner Tim Tebow tweeted, “When the law stops protecting you from the corrupt but protects the corrupt from you a nation is doomed. Fight back!” (He wasn’t tweeting about Trump.)
royexum@aol.com