posted March 5, 2004
The "American Idol" contestants are yet to be narrowed down to the final 12, but one lucky contestant already has a record deal, a fan club, a music video, scores of Web sites devoted to him and too many TV appearances to mention -- and he didn't even survive the first cut.
William Hung's tryout, an energetic, if tuneless, rendition of Ricky Martin's ribald "She Bangs," was not well received by the show's three-judge panel.
After suffering through Hung's 90-second audition, during which he shouted the song's chorus and failed miserably at imitating Ricky Martin's pelvic thrusts, Hung was mercifully interrupted by judge Simon Cowell. "You can't sing, you can't dance, so what do you want me to say?" asked Cowell.
I expected Hung to hang his head in shame and slink away after enduring Simon's withering criticism. But instead Hung earnestly and humbly replied "I already gave my best, and I have no regrets at all" and gallantly walked away with a backpack on his shoulder, most likely headed to the library to continue his studies. And thus a star, albeit a rather nerdy one, was born. William Hung is no longer just a university student -- he is now an international star.
In trying to explain his hilariously dreadful performance, Hung confessed, "You know, I have no professional training of singing." That's like Mike Tyson, admitting "You know, I'm not a Rhodes Scholar" after one of his "I'm going to kill you sucka" rants.
"I already gave my best, and I have no regrets at all" will go down in history with "Give me liberty or give me death" and "I regret that I have but one life to give for my country."
William Hung is an inspiration to every nerdy, geeky and hapless guy that always fails at everything. The next time that a hottie at a bar turns me down by saying, "You are ugly and you give me the creeps, sorry but what can I say?" I can walk away with my head held high, knowing that "I already gave my best, and I have no regrets at all." If my dear readers don 't like this essay -- I already gave my best and I have no regrets at all.
Hung may have the fashion sense of a blind man, the singing ability of a baboon, the dancing adroitness of a robot and the sex appeal of a decomposing corpse, but he has charisma up the wazoo.
Nobody remembers the name of any of the current crop of American Idol contestants, but who can forget William Hung? His goofy smile and his earnest spirit are indelibly imprinted in our brains. If Kerry chooses William Hung as his running mate, he will win in a landslide.
Hung may not be the "American Idol" but he is a hero to those of us who don't have a pearly white smile, perfectly styled hair, a designer wardrobe and the gift of gab. The "Hong Kong Ricky Martin" has given me the courage to shake my bon bon and croon "She Bangs" albeit in the privacy of my shower.
I will applaud and respect the talent of the eventual winner of the "American Idol" competition, but I will cherish and adore the humility, earnestness and "never say die" spirit of America's lovable loser William Hung.
Robert Paul Reyes
Lynchburg, VA RReyes4966@aol.com
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