by Mike North
posted December 26, 2004
 Mike North |
If that is so, does that reflect badly upon the tradition of resolving to better ourselves at the beginning of a new year, or does it reflect badly on us?
I use the last week of the year for reflection, introspection, and resolution. I encourage you to do the same. But how, practically speaking, does one go about such a process?
You can begin by starting the new year with a journal. Reflect upon the past year. Write down the joys, pain, successes and failures. Make a list of the people you love, and of those that you may not care for quite as much. Honestly assess where you are in your relationships and career or life goals. Keep the journal all year long. It will be invaluable come time to repeat the process next year.
The next step is introspection. Look at that list of failures. Were they your fault, or beyond your control? What could you have done differently? Do you deserve the credit for your successes? What about those people with whom you don't get along? Could you do more to get along with them? Are you where you want to be in life? If so, how do you prepare for the next step? If not, why not?
Be frank with yourself. Make note of the things that you know need improvement. The first part of any battle plan is a thorough analysis of the enemy, his strengths, and his weaknesses. This is no less important when the enemy is yourself.
Being totally honest with ourselves may be the hardest part of this process. We tend to rationalize. This tendency is the biggest obstacle to personal growth and improvement. The lack of self-discipline is a problem too, but even that is easier to correct if we’ll admit that we’re lazy sluggards totally lacking willpower.
Now it’s time to write your game plan. You know where you need help, and you know your personal challenges. You need to write down concrete, realistic, and achievable goals. Benjamin Franklin set about to develop a program of self improvement wherein he listed the virtues he wanted to develop as “Temperance, Silence, Order, Resolution, Frugality, Industry, Sincerity, Justice, Moderation, Cleanliness, Tranquility, Chastity and Humility,”
History tells us that Franklin was more successful at developing some of those virtues than at developing others, but the effort was admirable nonetheless. And there is little doubt that if he became only half as resolute, frugal, industrious or humble as he wished, then he was still twice as much so as when he began.
The last step is to execute your plan. This is where the journal helps most. Use it to look back at those goals, and to catalog your successes and failures in achieving them. Help yourself to stay on task by keeping your journal in a prominent place – both for convenience, and as a (sometimes uncomfortable) reminder of your commitment to yourself.
The real key to success is to realize that this is an ongoing process, repeated each January. In some areas you will experience success beyond that to which you aspired. In other areas, you may fall short. As Franklin wrote of his efforts to develop humility, “In reality, there is, perhaps, no one of our natural passions so hard to subdue as pride…even if I could conceive that I had compleatly overcome it, I should probably be proud of my humility.”
But both Ben Franklin and those around him benefited from his effort. Of his interaction with others he wrote, “I soon found the advantage of this change in my manner; the conversations I engag'd in went on more pleasantly. The modest way in which I propos'd my opinions procur'd them a readier reception and less contradiction; I had less mortification when I was found to be in the wrong, and I more easily prevail'd with others to give up their mistakes and join with me when I happened to be in the right.”
We may not succeed in every effort, but like Franklin, we and those around us will be better for the effort. James H. Toner said it best: “One has character who struggles (though not always successfully) to do what should be done.”
Make resolutions. Struggle to keep them. The effort can at times be its own reward.
(Mike North writes a regular op-ed column for six newspapers in the southeast Tennessee, northwest Georgia and northeast Alabama region. He is a professional land surveyor with True Line Company, Land Surveyors. He is a former Walker County School Board member and a student of history and political science. He can be reached at
Mike@myhumbleopinion.net
His columns are at
Mike North Columns )
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