by Dave Stuckey
posted March 20, 2005
 Dave Stuckey |
First of all, let me say I知 sorry. I知 sorry to all the people who look up to me that I have hurt. I know that my actions have let you down.
I知 sorry for the millions of people who spend their last hard-earned dollars just to catch a rare glimpse of me. In an era of mediocrity, I only became great for you every once and a while, probably never showing my full potential because, to be honest, I知 lazy.
My rivals are probably laughing out loud at my utter stupidity and self-inflicted self-destruction. Although my competition has had their problems, I know that does not give me the right to do the things I have done to you. I am supposed to be above the rest, right?
Let me also say that this downward spiral did not happen overnight. Maybe you overlooked my imperfections because you were so in love with me. Maybe I did not take time to look in the mirror and realize that I needed to make some changes in my life.
I mean, I crossed racial barriers before half of the country but I know racism still shows its ugly face deep in my soul. I have outlasted gruesome wars but I have never been better than those soldiers who, in their time of heroic acts, still said that I was their hero.
Don稚 get me wrong, I know I have done some great things as well!
Remember that time in Atlanta when those two kids got a little too happy and patted me on the back for my ultimate accomplishment. They got arrested that night but you couldn稚 blame them for being overzealous.
What about the time in St. Louis when I broke into your apartment and interrupted your regular scheduled television programming. You didn稚 mind because you and me dated just about every night that year. Or when our country was attacked on September 11th, I tried my hardest to bring normalcy back to life.
Look, this letter is not a cry for pity; it is a cry for forgiveness. So to everyone that truly loves me more than I love myself, let me say this:
I知 sorry for letting one Jackie play when I could have let every Jackie play.
I知 sorry for being greedy and not coming to work in 1994.
I知 sorry for making some of you save multiple paychecks just to see me one time.
I知 sorry for charging seven dollars a beer.
I知 sorry for giving sportswriters the opportunity to crucify me for things I could have avoided.
I知 sorry for being addicted to drugs knowing every kid in America may start taking drugs because of me.
I知 sorry for being the reason for a congressional hearing which cost taxpayers more money.
I知 sorry that the congressional hearing made a mockery of me and wasted time and energy that could have been used to bring our troops home.
I hope you can forgive me although I知 not sure if I will be able to forgive myself. And although my accomplishments have sometimes been extraordinary, I am ashamed for my actions over my lifetime.
Once again, from the bottom of my heart, I love you and I am truly sorry.
Sincerely,
Major League Baseball
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