Bill Hewgley
Go back in time to your childhood when your parents were scolding you to either do something or stop doing something which bothered them. If you have children, come forward to the times you were attempting the same thing…over and over.
Do you remember at least one parent threatening punishment repeatedly, but not following through? You learned as an infant that people did not always mean what they said and their threats were hollow. If it was like my house, when Mother gave up on John and I fighting, her words were: “I am going to tell your father…” Boy, did we straighten up and fly right! We knew he would whip us at the drop of the hat and throw it down as he was walking in the room. Any order from him was not up for discussion, a vote or grousing under our breath – the punishment for even slow walking was immediate and severe…and Heaven forbid if we rolled our eyes at him!
Back in the 1950’s, there were no happy face stickers to put on the refrigerator for good behavior; there were only Band-Aids for us to cover the cuts from a privet hedge limb or his gigantic belt. Child bribery came along after us as the 1960’s moms embraced Dr. Spock’s process to create a “perfect child” through gentle guidance and rewards. If you are one of those lucky flower children of the 60”s, my brother and I would like to buy you a beer and hear how it was being able to negotiate with your Dad!
The point is, that for better or worse, we knew exactly what Dad stood for, what he expected of us and what the punishment would be for failure to comply quickly and competently. Just trying hard did not guarantee safe passage, for he demanded success. After a few years, we learned to anticipate his state of mind and how tight he was wound up so we could get out ahead of his anger by either over performing our tasks, or getting enough distance from him to escape the wrath. He was absolutely consistent in both his expectations and his methods of correction, so it worked.
Once I got out of college and entered the business world, it was difficult for me to learn how to respond to the many vague, duplicitous and confusing instructions some of my bosses would call out. I thought straight, direct, honest communication was the only choice; I had never been around flexible, conditional honesty and integrity. In Dad’s world, it was either right or it was wrong…that’s all that mattered.
One day, I questioned an older executive about how everything went from black & white to shades of gray, the higher I climbed the economic ladder. When I began to learn just how some high -minded people had gotten to the top, his words rang in my ears: “ethics are a matter of solvency.” What I was seeing was a complete disconnect between what some business people espoused and what they actually did when push came to shove. Hypocrisy to me is a mortal sin – I would respect you more for just being honest about who you are in your heart, even if it disgusts me.
You know exactly what to expect when dealing with a Gordon Gekko type in the movie “Wall Street” or a Tommy DeVito type in “Goodfellas;” thus you have a chance to protect yourself from harm. I am far more fearful of those who present themselves as a friend, only to get close enough to pick your pockets, or worse.
Think about how you manage your home life or your business and grade yourself on clarity, consistency and accountability. Do your children or employees believe what you say? Do they believe poor behavior has negative consequences? Do they believe that good performance will be recognized and rewarded? Do they trust and respect your leadership? Do they want to follow you into battle?
All people want is clear, fair rules and an impartial judge and jury. Too many times, those we lead believe that fairness and respect is a matter of solvency also.
Say what you mean.
Mean what you say.
Do what you said you would do.
Do it every time, all the time.
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Bill Hewgley is president, Metalworking Solutions, LLC, a company he founded after retiring as president of American Manufacturing Company. One of his chief priorities is to mentor this upcoming millennial generation, while honoring those who helped him find his own way in life, by passing it on.
You can contact Bill at mailto:Bill@metalworkingsolution.com and visit Metalworking Solutions at www.metalworkingsolution.com.