Cranfield Rowell: Disclaimer Needed For Romantic Comedies

Friday, March 2, 2018 - by Cranfield Rowell

Why does the world of cinema only use disclaimers before airing an episode of a television series or a documentary? I assume that disclaimers are used strictly for television because televisions are in homes and sometimes homes have children in them. And some people are very particular in what they allow to be shown on their sets. I get that. I respect that. But why aren’t disclaimers used before movies?

“The following feature contains elements horrific in nature. Disturbing murders are depicted. It is possible that you will associate places that are normally seen as safe havens as possible realms of torture. Enjoy.”

Every genre of movie could use a good disclaimer; however, there is one genre that should require them: romantic comedy.

Is there any genre that does more damage to a viewer than a romantic comedy? The previews convince you that you’re going to have a good time. And you may actually have a good time. Kissing is awesome, until you realize later that it’s how you got mono. Romantic comedies are disturbing brutal to men and women.

When I was a young child I watched a movie where a man liked this woman a lot. She didn’t seem to like him at all. In one particular scene the hero grabbed his stubborn love and kissed her. She seemed to like it. So young Cranfield took that movie lesson to school with him. I did not think it was fair for my teacher to call my mother nor was it cool to put me in the corner for time out. All I did was grab and kiss my crush. Love can happen to first graders right? I thought so for a long time, as proved by multiple time out sessions.

What kind of damage do these movies do? Let’s discuss a few.

In most of these movies the woman is very klutzy. Everyone loves her. She has no flaws. She’s not looking for love. She’s gorgeous yet for some reason no one knows it, including herself. She has a best friend that all the guys love. That’s real life right? A lot of these films feature the man doing all the work. He’s doing all the sweet things. All she has to do is let him pursue her. All she has to do is take. He gives. You know, because he’s in love already. He has to earn her love by showering her with attention and gifts. When she finally gives in to the one-sided relationship everyone ends up happily ever after. There are many women who believe that there is a prince waiting around the corner prepared to shower her with gifts and adoration, all she has to do is let him worship her and they’ll both be happy. That’s not how life or love works. It takes both people to work in a relationship.

There are many men who have seen a romantic comedy and thought, “Oh, so if I show up to her house or work with flowers, tell her she’s beautiful, and ask her out on a date she’ll say yes. Because I am good guy.” Wrong. If she barely knows you, you never existed to her but only platonically, or she never found you attractive in the first place it doesn’t matter how genuine you are or if you are a great guy. You’re either getting maced in the face or will be crawling away in agony hoping you can still have children.

 A lot of these movies depict women as leading meaningless lives because they are single. A woman and a man can be perfectly happy single. Men and women do not need another person to complete them, but is nice to have someone that complements who you are with who they are.

 If a woman or man stands outside your door or window at odd hours of the day and night it must mean that this person really loves you. The reality is that the person probably wants you only to his or her self, alive or not. 

 According to some movies if a person stands you up or treats you like you're trash then eventually they’ll come around and see the mistake they made. Not true. If a person stands you up or treats you like you don’t exist then you are better off without that person in your life. Those kinds of people are self-absorbed and aren’t good people to be around in general.

We need to stop watching this genre of movies. Or we can just take ‘romantic’ away and leave the ‘comedy’ part.

“The following feature is a romantic comedy. Women and men, do not use the characters in this film as a template. This film is completely unrealistic. Love does not work this way. If you feel like reenacting any portions of this film to a future love interest seek out counseling.” 



Candidate Forum To Be Held At The Bethlehem Center

The Bethlehem Center will host a forum where community members can meet the candidates. Each candidate will speak and answer questions presented by  community members. The forum will be held on Thursday  from 6-8 p.m. at the Bethlehem Center at 200 W 38th St. “This event matter because these are the candidates for offices that most closely affect our ... (click for more)

Chattanooga Chosen As Pilot City For New EmcArts Program

Chattanooga has been chosen as the location for a new workshop series designed for artists in Chattanooga called “Artists as Change Agents within Complexity”. The program is facilitated by EmcArts, a national arts service organization that works alongside individuals, organizations and communities as they tackle their most complex challenges. In this series, which consists of ... (click for more)

Red Bank Finalizes 20-Cent Property Tax Increase

The Red Bank commissioners voted Tuesday night to adopt the fiscal year 2018-2019 budget that includes a property tax increase. Mayor John Roberts said that along with the increase in both commercial and residential development, comes increased traffic. Infrastructure has not kept up with the growth, including the secondary roads. The cost of paving these roads is $1 million. Money ... (click for more)

Attorney Poston Says Man In Viral Video Seen Fighting Officer Was Trying To Break Up Fight

Attorney McCracken Poston said William Alexander Floyd, the young man seen in the recently published “viral” video who is seemingly engaged in a boxing match with a Chattanooga police officer, started out trying to break up a fight.   The attorney said, "Things are not always as they appear. There is a much more interesting story in the seconds leading up to the events ... (click for more)

The Boss, Claude Ramsey

I try not to overuse the word great, but we lost a great man today, Claude Ramsey. I had the pleasure of serving under him as director of Commercial and Industrial Properties for 14 years while he was the Hamilton County Assessor of Property. He was probably the smartest person I have ever known. He was tough but patient, kind, caring and compassionate. He knew how to get ... (click for more)

Roy Exum: So, You’re Invisible?

Several weeks ago I was in the middle of My Morning Readings when, somehow, I came across a wonderful story written by Nichole Johnson. Her website says she is a speaker, a motivator, and an author whose gift is to “capture the inner-most feelings of women facing life's daily struggles, and it has enabled her to create a unique sense of community for people of all ages.” That’s ... (click for more)