Jen Gienapp: Letting A Sparrow Go

Thursday, August 29, 2013 - by Jen Gienapp
Jen Gienapp
Jen Gienapp

We just got home, from taking our second kiddo to college. I thought it’d be easier, having been through it once before, but I think it just gets harder.

I once had a wise cousin tell me that she really preferred the teen years to the baby years. As a young mom, I doubted her, but her words always stuck with me. Now, as an older mom, I see her wisdom, and I’ve decided I love the teenage years the best. But with that, comes heartache.

I enjoyed the early years with my five children, and to this day, I love to hold a baby or a toddler, even change a diaper, or try to give a new mom a break, in trying to rock a baby to sleep. On occasion, I really miss those days.

But there’s really not anything like having teenagers.  I’ve decided that only death or a horrible accident could be harder than sending one’s kids to college. This really might be the toughest part of parenting.  Of course, I haven’t gone through marriage for them, then new jobs, disappointments and betrayals, and grandbabies, but for now, this is my angst.

The thing is, after you spend those first 15 years of parenting, through diapers, keeping them alive, pulling teeth, carpooling, videotaping, attending multitudes of games, shows, parent/teacher conferences, etc., all of a sudden, they turn into your friends. I’m not usually one to advocate the whole “parents should be friends to their kids” thing, but in a way, I am. By the time they get to be late teenagers, they ARE your friends, and I don’t see anything wrong with that.

We have enjoyed, by the grace of God, a good relationship with our oldest teens. I don’t take that for granted, as I know many parents don’t have that with theirs. But ours are funny, smart, talented, and sarcastic (they got that from their dad). That’s what makes it so hard to leave them. I want to be around them all the time. But at the same time, I want to let them go, and see what they’ll do as adults. There’s no way I would begrudge them that.

I do get sad, when I go into my daughter’s room, seeing what she left behind. The simplest things make me tear up. On the other hand, I’m waiting anxiously to hear about her fall class schedule. I’m happy I won’t have to wait up for her, when she’s driving home from ballet, late at night in Wyoming. But now I also worry about her driving in more intense traffic, and a multitude of other things. When I hugged my eldest, already gone for a couple years, goodbye, and heard him say, “love ya, mom,” my eyes welled – and he’s almost 20! I’ve been told the worry never goes away, no matter how old they get. But another cousin recently said to me, “Don’t worry, Jen. We’re all in God’s hands.” What a simple truth, that needs to become my daily mantra.

There are still kids’ transmissions to be fixed, tuition to be paid, books to be bought, and the late night phone conversations about college relationships or intern possibilities. At the same time, I have littles who need help with homework, and I have soccer practices and games to attend. It’s such an ongoing crazy life. Too soon, I know, it will be over.

But in the Bible, Matthew and Luke say, “Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God.” I know that God’s eye is on the sparrow, and I’m trusting in that for my children, both here and 2,300 miles away.

(Jen Gienapp and her husband, Andy, made the move from Chattanooga to Cheyenne, Wyoming, in 2011. She can be reached at emmegab@gmail.com)


Chattanooga Speaks Presents Panel Discussion On Race, Community And Culture

Chattanooga Speaks, founded by Main Street Innovations, invites the public to join a free discussion panel to be held at The Camp House on Tuesday from 6-8:30 p.m. about race, culture and community. "Events across the nation, and our city, are causing communities to come together and be solution orientated in the areas of race and equality. Not all people are doing this in a ... (click for more)

Weekly Roadway Activity Report for TDOT Region 2, July 21-27

Weekly Roadway Activity Report for TDOT Region 2 (Parts of East and Middle Tennessee) July 21 – July 27 Construction Projects Maintenance / Regionwide / On-Call / Multi-County Contracts Bledsoe County, SR-30 slide repair project near log mile 7.5:   Work on this project continues.  The contract includes excavating, stabilizing and rebuilding the road ... (click for more)

Hixson Man Charged With Sending Threatening Emails To General Sessions Court Judge

A 30-year-old Hixson man has been charged with making threats to kill General Sessions Court Judge Lila Statom after police said they found evidence to tie him to recent threats against the judge. David Lee Graham, of 1730 Colorado St., is charged with retaliation against a judge. His bond was raised to $100,000. Detective Ric Whaley said he had been conducting an investigation ... (click for more)

Man Arrested For Confronting Southside Grocery Employee With Gun

Brandon Jamal Appleberry, 27, was arrested on Monday after an altercation with an employee at Southside Grocery on West 38 th Street, officers said. Marty Witt, 44, told police that the suspect confronted him with a gun in his hand. Officers said security video from the store clearly showed Appleberry arguing with several people outside while holding a gun. The defendant ... (click for more)

Lock Her Up? - And Response

It's concerning that the Republican Party elite attending the recent convention would indict, convict and jail a political opponent, when the FBI found no criminal intent to compromise national security and no other law violations were found. This "lock her up" mob mentality is third world, over-the-edge behavior that has no place in a country based on the rule-of-law, where ... (click for more)

Roy Exum: Our Double Travesties

Back when we were kids the old guys taught us how to throw a one-two punch. It’s pretty impressive if you do it right, which is to jab your left fist into the thug’s face and then, as though it was a symphony, complete the combination as you deliver a powerful right cross to the same nose. If the thug has a gun, it doesn’t work as well. But, boy, did our community ever get clobbered ... (click for more)