There is a word that has a bad side and a good side. It is pride. Bad pride is famously known as hubris. Good pride is appreciation of the accomplishments of both people and initiatives that we care about. Pride can lead to great failure when we think too much of ourselves. Pride in our children or our work leads not to hubris, but to a feeling of satisfaction, hopefulness, and a renewed vigor to go deeper or commit more.
This was a proud week for this writer. Our son, Ben Daugherty, was sworn in to the Hamilton County School Board. All our children are extremely resourceful, have done equally well, and are still young. Thankful Davis, the oldest, recently presented her PhD research on literacy and art to a distinguished gathering in Copenhagen. John, who now lives in Austin, is among many things, an accomplished creator of music using his computer skills and self-taught steel guitar talents and creating music. Chris, another accomplished artist, just came back from St. Louis where he gathered Urban Artist from around the country to complete a civic art project. Ginnie, the youngest, has completed two master’s degrees in counselling and practices here in Chattanooga.
This type of pride is welcome to parents. It is not a bad thing.
Also, this week we were invited to an interview about the birth of Choices, a wonderful ministry in Chattanooga that is now a model to others around the country. The ministry focuses on providing loving service to expectant moms and fathers through pregnancy up to three years after birth. Almost 40 years ago, my wife Sally and myself, and two other young couples started this, then named AAA Women’s Services, with prayer and hard work. To see that a whole new generation God has raised up to serve now is not something we ever thought about. (Thank You, Father God.)
One of the gifts of old age is to reflect back over long periods and see how your prayers and efforts have done well. This is heartening. Efforts that may seem small and sacrificial at the time can often turn out with remarkable results benefiting a larger community. (Think of raising children.)
This same old age also gives you a certain perspective on the other side of pride, that which looks down on others. This is obnoxious. Encountering such boors is vexing and wearisome. Great wealth, great knowledge, great power, or exalted family lineage are sometimes of this ilk. Arrogance, not humility, is their mark. The class conflict of a Russian or English novel comes to mind.
As one reads history, you find that in government and other large enterprises a proud leader can be its downfall. The Roman empire disintegrated as the rulers and people became proud. Othello, Shakespeare’s proud king, comes to mind as does King Nebuchadnezzar in the book of Daniel.
But as we think on this word, let us think of the good that God has wrought in a life well lived by others that you have had something to do with. This is a type of civic, one might say religious, pride that motivates so many in Chattanooga to accomplish things that others have not thought possible.
In this same vein, think of the phrase, “I am ashamed of you.” The shaming of someone is the opposite of saying, “I am proud of you.” The most powerful words you can share with someone are, “I love you and I am proud of you.”
I heard a story this week of the late Bill Spencer, who led the local chapter of the Christian Business Men’s Committee for many years. He was a soft-spoken man, focusing over and over on one person at a time. At his funeral attended by hundreds, the question was asked, “Who here was positively impacted by Bill Spencer?” The whole church stood up. What a testimony!
Chattanooga is full of such stories. Our history is rich with people who toiled anonymously to create a better community. Humility, the opposite of pride, serves young and old, rich and poor, alike. May the quality of humility continue through successive generations and enrich the Chattanooga Story.
“Well done, good and faithful servant,” is a confirmation that one hopes all will look forward to.
Doug Daugherty