Roy Exum: The Saturday Funnies

Saturday, February 8, 2020 - by Roy Exum
Roy Exum
Roy Exum

The Saturday Funnies has always been puzzled why some people think it is funny when others get mad and throw temper tantrums and make fools of themselves. To answer this puzzler, after a week where a lot of famous people have gotten mad, one idea comes from life counselor Tim Webster on the Quora web site: “You are not laughing at the anger, you are laughing because of the loss of control. When you get angry, you give people control because it takes you out of your original character and the longer you show anger, the more you lose control. I don't believe in making fun of getting someone angry,” Tim adds, “because the anger can be directed at someone innocent.”

As our readers know, the Saturday Funnies comes from emails we receive in the week and its contents are not authored by us.

But today we are starting with an experiment. We begin with a letter written by conservative commentator Tucker Carlson a year or so ago. We then offer a news item that appeared in Friday’s Washington Examiner, which we believe may cause some readers to get angry. In the process of your anger, we offer several funnies that follow to show none of us should ever take ourselves too seriously. Again, this is only a light-hearted experiment not intended for any other reason but the hope we can disagree and still be friends.

* * *


I found this interesting...

"In 1992, the United States welcomed 10 year old Ilhan Omar and her family into the United States. She was born in Somalia, one of the world's poorest countries, ruled by a Marxist Military Dictator. She and her family fled a terrible Civil War, and ended up in a refugee camp in Kenya. She spent four years there, until America offered Asylum, and they settled in Minneapolis.

Omar's father drove a taxi at first, and then he got a job with the post office, the government. Omar meanwhile, grew up free in the world's richest country, and with all the Bounty that implies. She went to a State University, and a few years later was elected a member of Congress. She was elected by voters who were proud to see an immigrant succeed.

Omar, at the age of 36, is now one of the most powerful women in America. It's an amazing story! Only in America could this ever happened. Ilhan Omar has a lot to be thankful for!

But she isn't grateful. At all!

And after everything America has done for Omar, and her family, she hates this country more than ever!

In a recent piece in the Washington Post, a reporter puts it this way ... "In Omar's version, America isn't the big-hearted country that saved her from a brutal war and a bleak refugee camp. It wasn't a meritocracy that helped her to attend college or vaulted her into Congress."

"Instead, it was the country that had failed to live up to its founding ideals, a place that had disappointed her and so many immigrants, refugees and minorities like her."

Omar isn't disappointed in America, she's enraged by it! Virtually every public statement she makes accuses Americans of bigotry and racism. This is an immoral country she says. She has undisguised contempt for the United States and its people.

That should worry you.

She is living proof that the way we practice immigration has become dangerous to this country. A system designed to strengthen America is instead undermining it. The people we try hardest to help, have come to hate us.

It's maybe our fault, for asking too little of our immigrants. We don't ask them to assimilate, so they never feel fully American.

Or maybe the problem is deeper than that, we're importing people from places whose values are antithetical to ours. But there is a problem. And whatever the cause, this is not sustainable.

No country can import large numbers of people who hate it and expect to survive. The Romans were the last to try that with predictable results.

So be grateful for ilhan Omar, annoying as she is. She is a living fire alarm, a warning to the rest of us, that we better change our immigration system immediately. Or else."

 Tucker Carlson (written July 9, 2019)

* * *


“Members of the left-wing "Squad" praised Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi for shredding President Trump's State of the Union address after he finished his speech. "Everyone is so focused on that fact Speaker @TeamPelosi ripped it, but not *why* she did," Rep. Rashida Tlaib said Tuesday night on Twitter, adding, "I would have shredded it. #justsaying."

“Rep. Ilhan Omar shared footage of the speaker shredding the speech along with a video of Pelosi's viral clap at Trump during last year's State of the Union address. Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who boycotted the speech along with fellow Squad member Rep. Ayanna Pressley, posted a video of the moment on her Twitter. In a post-State of the Union response, the New York Democrat praised the speaker's actions as an "audacious move." Pressley shared footage of the moment online too.”

* * *


(From Yahoo! Answers:  Some people are ''emotionally illiterate'' and fail to understand that when people (generally) get angry, they do so because they feel hurt in some respect:  that they are being ignored:  that their feelings have not been taken into consideration:  that they are being talked Down to / treated like a child:  they are being lied to etc etc. 

“People (naturally enough) fear 'Anger' and the violence and destruction which can emerge from it (depending on the reasons / rationale / circumstances), and they counter that fear with laughter / humour. It is exactly the same as the reaction to ''Threats'' to their person with 'Fight or Flight' .....and or hopefully, the laughter would be to dilute the anger.  Unfortunately, at times, laughter at someone’s distress can be like adding fuel to the fire, and simple goes to make matters worse.”

* -- “Being angry is as close as a human being can come to experiencing hell on earth.” -- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

* -- “When angry, count to ten before you speak. If very angry, count to one hundred.” – Thomas Jefferson

Glad we got that one taken care of!

* * *


(There is a chance this funny will get me shot!)

#10 - You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

# 9 - You can keep one gun at home and have another when you're on the road.

# 8 - If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out.

# 7 - Your primary gun doesn't mind if you keep another gun for a backup.

# 6 - Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

# 5 - A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

# 4 - Guns function normally every day of the month.

# 3 - A gun doesn't ask, "Do these new grips make me look fat?"

# 2 - A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

# 1 - You can buy a silencer for a gun.

* * *


A young woman brought her fiancé home to meet her parents.

After dinner, her mother told the girl's father to find out about the young man.

The father invited the fiancé to his study for a talk.

"So, what are your plans?" the father asked the young man.

"I am a biblical scholar," he replied.

"A biblical scholar, hmmm?" the father said. "Admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in?"

"I will study," the young man replied, "and God will provide for us."

"And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?" asked the father.

"I will concentrate on my studies," the young man replied, "God will provide for us."

"And children?" asked the father. "How will you support children?"

"Don't worry, sir; God will provide," replied the fiancé. The conversation proceeded like this . . . and each time the father questioned, the young idealist insisted that God would provide.

Later, the mother asked, "How did your talk go, honey?"

Her father answered, "He's a Democrat. He has no job, he has no plans, and he thinks I'm God!”

* * *


Thursday’s Question: Why doesn’t President Trump wear glasses?

Answer: ‘Cause he’s got 2020, baby!

* * *


This is a very true and very real story from one of my heroes, Travis Mills, and what every one of us can do with our attitude is “we own it.” Trust me, you’ll want to pass this one around. CLICK HERE.


Roy Exum: Believe In Harbingers?

Reappraisal Equals Redistribution Of Wealth

Marty Haynes Is Still The Man For The Job - And Response

A harbinger, we have been taught, is “something that foreshadows a future event,” or “something that gives an anticipatory sign of what is to come.” Last week in Connecticut, the families of ... (click for more)

Here’s a simple and accurate explanation of the Hamilton County property reappraisal results. Picture three adjacent property owners–you and your two next door neighbors. One neighbor to your ... (click for more)

It is with great pleasure that I support Marty Haynes for re-election as our assessor of property. I have grown up with Marty and his entire family and you could not find a more honest and ... (click for more)


Roy Exum: Believe In Harbingers?

A harbinger, we have been taught, is “something that foreshadows a future event,” or “something that gives an anticipatory sign of what is to come.” Last week in Connecticut, the families of three high school athletes – all female – filed a lawsuit against the Connecticut Interscholastic Athletic Conference. The lawsuit claims a current CIAC policy is a violation of the federal ... (click for more)

Reappraisal Equals Redistribution Of Wealth

Here’s a simple and accurate explanation of the Hamilton County property reappraisal results. Picture three adjacent property owners–you and your two next door neighbors. One neighbor to your left, one to your right, and you in the middle. Imagine that the county assessor gives one of your neighbors a tax break. That’s easy enough, just by juggling the new appraisals. Now, ... (click for more)

Breaking News

Human Remains Found In Walker County

Human skeletal remains were found in Walker County in a wooded area about 500 yards off the roadway, east of the 4000 block of South Highway 27, Lafayette, by a man and his son while they were hunting Monday morning, according to Walker County Sheriff Steve Wilson. The remains are believed to be those of a Walker County man missing since Sept. 30. Robert “Robbie” Sisson III, ... (click for more)

Hinds Trial Set Sept. 29; Judge Declines Change Of Venue; Defense Seeks Evidence On Alleged 2nd Vehicle That Ran Over Body

Janet Hinds, who allegedly drove drunk and killed officer Nicholas Galinger in 2019, had her trial set for Sept. 29. Criminal Court Judge Don Poole also believed there was no need for a change of venue, saying that the court could go through a large number of candidates and find unbiased jurors in Hamilton County. Defense attorney Ben McGowan claimed that the police department ... (click for more)


Tennessee's Trey Smith Named Jason Witten Man Of The Year

ennessee junior offensive lineman Trey Smith was named the 2020 Jason Witten Collegiate Man of the Year by a subset of the award’s Board of Directors on Tuesday night at the Star in Frisco, the practice facility of the Dallas Cowboys. The Jason Witten Collegiate Man of the Year Award is presented annually to the Division I college football player who has demonstrated a record ... (click for more)

#25 Lady Vols Fall Short In Upset Bid Over #16 Texas A&M, 73-71

No. 25 Tennessee pulled to within two points in the final minute but couldn't overcome a No. 16/18 Texas A&M team that went 28 of 33 from the free-throw line en route to a 73-71 victory in Thompson-Boling Arena on Sunday afternoon. Sophomore Rae Burrell led UT (17-8, 7-5 SEC) with 19 points and seven rebounds in front of a season-best crowd of 12,738. Junior Rennia Davis ... (click for more)