Best of Grizzard - New Mayor Candidates?

  • Friday, February 23, 2024
  • Jerry Summers

Two former candidates for the top political spot in Choo Choo City (TK), the number one seat sitter in Hamilton County (WW) anticipated to run again with Reuben T. as his campaign manager/treasurer and his yet unannounced former challenger who is piling up big bucks in the peddling of property game, Lewis Grizzard (LG) might have a few words of political wisdom for the above and any other potential aspirants.

After repeated requests from a group of dentists in the capitol of the Peach State it is not well known that LG was a serious potential candidate for the position of non-royal king of Metro Atlanta.

Impressed by the fact that the three non-licensed dental practitioners out of 10,000 cavity fillers encouraged LG to enter the political circus he contemplated making the race.

In “Won’t You Come Home Billy Bob Bailey?” (1980- Peachtree Publishers) he initially makes some uncomplimentary remarks about the incumbent city/county leaders that would have no applicability to the upcoming Gig City/Hamilton County contests. A portion of the published article in the local tabloid and approximately 474 other syndicated newspapers throughout America follows but you will have to buy the book from the “Lewis Grizzard Museum” in metropolitan Moreland for the rest of the story (if any are available):

“ I know you are all going to fall down laughing when you read this but it wasn’t my idea. It came from a group of dentists over at Emory University.

They wrote me a letter that began, ‘Atlanta is ready for, and in need of, responsible leadership in city government.’

The understatement of the year. Our City Council is a monkey show, at best, and our mayor- you read it here first- was dropped on his head as a small boy, which explains some of his delirious actions like making plans to run in a statewide election against Senator Herman Talmadge.

Outside Atlanta, they think Maynard Jackson is the name of a new hog vaccine.

You also have to question they mayor’s recruiting abilities. He gave the city A. Reginald Eaves, remember. And he is also responsible for Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle-Dee, Brown and Napper, over at police headquarters.

Their crack leadership of the police force has the rest of us looking for places to hide, as the crime rate soars. A friend in Des Moines called the other day and said, ‘I was planning to come visit you in Atlanta but now I’m not sure. Shouldn’t we plan to meet somewhere safer? Like Juarez or Newark?’

The dentists over at Emory have strongly suggested that because I am always writing as if I know it all, maybe I should run for mayor of Atlanta in the upcoming 1981 election.

Pull yourselves together. It's not that damned funny. I was treasurer of my freshman class in high school, and when I was a kid, I used to shovel out what the horses left in the barn. I know a little something about politics.

(What does shoveling out what horses leave in the barn have to do with politics? I don't think I have to answer that question.)

Dr. Thomas W. McDonald has appointed himself campaign chairman of the "Grizzard for Mayor in '81 Committee," and he lists Dr. George Ulrich and Dr. George Pryles as his associates.

Their letter drafting my candidacy further stated, "Campaign strategy and meetings are under way, and an effective bumper sticker blitz has been initiated."

I must say I am flattered. "Mayor Lewis Grizzard." "Mr. Mayor Lewis Grizzard." "His Honor, Mayor Lewis Grizzard." They all have a certain ring.”

(Unfortunately LG’s political campaign never got high off the ground as he did not start running two years before election day, but did start unsuccessfully selling bumper stickers (13.5) “Grizzard for Hot-lanta Mayor.”)

PS- Two important questions remain:

1) When can the public expect a barrage of BS on the front and back of vehicles of our locals?

2) What other community minded public servants will enter the political battlegrounds?

(Any far fetched comparisons of Fulton-Cobb counties, etc. to Choo Choo City/Hamilton County is once again outside the intent and scope of this article!)

* * *

You can reach Jerry Summers at jsummers@summersfirm.com

Jerry Summers
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