Friends gather around Lisa Govan
We all know there are angels among us. Doubtless we’ve all witnessed them many times. I was blessed to see them in action this past month, when Andy Govan, a kind, gentle soul, died suddenly at age 65.
A whole band of them descended upon his widow, Lisa, lifting her up in so many ways. Some of them planned food and drink for the visitation, seeing to every last detail. Some of them stood by her, being present for her, checking on her, their steady presence a blessing. Some traveled across the country to be with her during the terrible week, and others drove a full day to give her a hug, and got in the car the next day and drove back home.
My brother, who lives in New York, offered his condo for Mary Jane, Lisa’s childhood friend who travelled from L.A. for the week. I came by to give Lisa a hug, and there they all were, some of her oldest friends. Sally and Abbie and Woo and Lisa all were crowded together in the kitchen as Mary Jane prepared a wonderful meal of fresh salmon and roasted leeks with new potatoes. The table was set with linens and stemware, and wine was flowing.
I hugged her tight, and began to cry as she patted me!
This woman is broken-hearted. Her grief is immense. She is terrified of life without Andy. She has lost her sister and her parents. She needed to feel that she was going to be okay, that somehow, life was going to go on.
And these women showed her that. They grounded her with old stories from their shared pasts and they related easily and honestly to each other, not monitoring their words or their feelings. And this was a comfort.
Mary Jane dressed Lisa in her own stylish clothes, complete with sleek black gloves and pointed high heel boots and a fabulous wool jacket. She did her makeup, adding bright red lipstick as a final flourish. And they had to laugh, especially Lisa.
And as the mirth filled them and lifted them up for a few minutes, it opened a crack for healing to begin. Or maybe just enough for Lisa to know that it could.
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Ferris Robinson is the author of three children’s books, “The Queen Who Banished Bugs,” “The Queen Who Accidentally Banished Birds,” and “Call Me Arthropod” in her pollinator series “If Bugs Are Banished.” “Making Arrangements” is her first novel. “Dogs and Love - Stories of Fidelity” is a collection of true tales about man’s best friend. Her website is ferrisrobinson.com and you can download a free pollinator poster there. She is the editor of The Lookout Mountain Mirror and The Signal Mountain Mirror.
Ferris Robinson