Roy Exum
As best I can remember, I was switched with “tree branches” in at least five different Southern states when I was growing up. These seemingly endless and quite deliberate incidents of corporal punishment were not just doled out by my parents but others got into the act -- my grandmother, my aunts and or whoever else felt I deserved a whacking. There were even some notable African-American women who immediately focused on the backs of my knees after the leaves on those tree branches, which weighed only a few ounces, were stripped away and soon felt like angry yellow jackets.
But it was all for good reason. I deserved it. Trust me, I knew the rules going in and so did my brothers. So when I saw where Minnesota Vikings running back Adrian Peterson was booked and charged with reckless or negligent injury to a child over the weekend, I wondered if the after-shock of fellow NFL player Ray Rice brutally punching out his wife hasn’t now gone a little too far.
Domestic violence is a horrible thing. There are laws against it in every state and I like what Steve Spurrier, the South Carolina football coach, said in his succinct way, “If you hit a girl you aren’t playing here. Period.”
But there are no laws in any state that prohibit a parent from disciplining a child. It is estimated that between 85 and 90 percent of all Americans have been spanked before reaching adolescence. The Texas Attorney General’s office even has an exception for “reasonable discipline” and the Lone Star State is one of 19 states that still allow corporal punishment – paddling – in schools.
While the bleeding hearts assure us that these early childhood encounters may increase aggression and could have emotional consequences, the quick switching to an errant child on a hot Sunday afternoon can straighten up the neighborhood much faster than an hour of studying Sunday School memory work. We were never abused … not at all … and from a casual study of Adrian Peterson, he hardly seems the type who would intentional harm his own kid.
Peterson, who grew up in east Texas before becoming a legend as a running back at Georgia Southern, has a speech impediment and volunteers time to help kids who also suffer. He has a new book coming out along that line, “Don’t Dis My Abilities.” He has a strong family background and I’m more of a mind to wait before I label him a monster like those degenerates who burn kids with cigarettes and force-feed them liquid soap. There is a marked difference, I’m telling you, in discipline and abuse.
Naturally, it was obviously a popular topic on the NFL talk shows and Charles Barkley bristled when Boomer Esiason taunted the issue. “I’m from the South. I understand Boomer’s (Esiason) rage and anger. He’s a white guy and I’m a black guy. I don’t know where he’s from, I’m from the South. Whipping — we do that all the time,” he told Jim Rome.
“Every black parent in the South is going to be in jail under those circumstances. We have to be careful letting people dictate how,” he continued before being interrupted by Rome: “It doesn’t matter where you’re from! Right is right and wrong is wrong!” blurted the host.
But Barkley kept his tone civil: “I don’t believe that because, listen, we spank kids in the South. I think the question about did Adrian Peterson go overboard — Listen, Jim, we all grow up in different environments. Every black parent in my neighborhood in the South would be in trouble or in jail under those circumstances.”
Rome countered, “My thing is: I don’t want to tell anybody how to raise their kids and I really don’t want anybody telling me how to raise my kids. But let’s make a distinction between ‘child rearing’ and ‘child abuse.’ That was child abuse. There’s no fine line here.”
Barkley again disagreed. “I think there’s a fine line. Jim, I’ve had many welts on my legs.”
Rome asked if the welts were like what was being shown to TV viewers “Yes, I’ve gotten beat with switches — and I don’t even like the term.” said Barkley. “We called it ‘spanking’ or ‘whipping’ our kids.”
Trust me, I know what he’s talking about.
royexum@aol.om