I volunteer at the same retirement community I worked at for almost 15 years. I continue to conduct a group I call O.W.L.S. (Older Wiser Loving Seniors) The group prays, I read a devotional, then I present a topic for discussion.
Last week I read the above quote by Eleanor Roosevelt and asked, “What makes a person beautiful?”
I think I know what makes people beautiful (no matter what their age,) but I wanted to know if my group of 80 and 90-year-olds had other ideas.
Douglas (not his real name) quipped “Beauty is only skin deep—but ugly goes down to the bone.” Not quite what I was looking for, but he’s usually quiet, so at least he was speaking.
Someone else said a good heart is beautiful.
Gloria said “wisdom makes you beautiful.”
Other thoughts on what makes a person beautiful included:
Kindness
Experience
Perseverance
Politeness
Charm
Good personality
Can-do attitude
Knowledge
Someone mentioned Margie, a resident who died a few years ago at 104.
She remains in our hearts because she was beautiful—maybe not physically, but beautiful in character. She loved everyone and told us so daily. She complimented each of us about the personal attributes she thought made us special.
It surprised me when Gertrude said if a person dresses nicely and is neat and tidy, they are beautiful. Hmm. I thought by the time we reach 80, no one cared how we dressed. Maybe I’ll have to re-think that.
According to research, we make an impression, for good or for bad, within seven seconds of meeting someone. And we begin to judge another’s characteristics, such as whether they are trustworthy or attractive, during that same seven seconds. We judge people quickly—probably subconsciously—even when we know we shouldn’t. Gertrude may have been the most self-aware person in the group.
If we dismiss people as not being worth our time based on appearance or first impressions, we miss out on knowing some pretty amazing people.
You may remember when Susan Boyle, a plain, middle-aged woman, stepped up to the microphone to sing on Britain’s Got Talent, Simon Cowell practically rolled his eyes. Next thing we knew, she stunned the audience, and Simon, with her beautiful operatic voice and has gone on to enjoy a great singing career.
Then there was the pastor who disguised himself as a homeless man and hung out in front of his church with a shopping cart full of belongings. The point, of course, was to teach a lesson about not judging by outward appearances. The pastor was gratified to see how many congregants stopped to give him food, pray for him, and invite him to church. Some avoided him, of course, and didn’t make eye contact. When the pastor revealed he was the “homeless” man, I imagine some of the church members were very embarrassed.
I may well have been one of the embarrassed avoiders. I don’t intend on judging people based on appearance, and I try not to, but I’m sure I sometimes do.
Eventually we will all have to accept that our outward beauty will fade and all that will remain is whatever inner beauty we’ve developed. I hope I’m developing some inner beauty.
In 1 Peter 3:3-4 we read: “Your beauty should not come from outward adornments, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.”
Good words to consider.
I’ve recently begun to accept that I’m an “older woman” (Most people realize they’re an older man/woman before age 77, but I’m a late bloomer.) I tell myself I look young for my age, but does it really matter? Other qualities are far more important, such as:
Kindness
Experience
Perseverance
Politeness
Charm
Good personality
Can-do attitude
Knowledge
Just ask my friends at the retirement community (except Gertrude.)
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