As a fiscally conservative Republican and twice a George W. Bush voter, I feel responsible to assist the exiting President in selection of a fitting address for the George Walker Bush Presidential Library. While the campus of Southern Methodist University has been named as home to this magnificent historic repository, I would like to offer serious alternatives for public discussion.
Given the consternation and dismay of numerous SMU students with regard to their campus' nomination as the Shrine-to-GW, perhaps further site study is warranted.
Future generations wishing a window into the Bush Presidency may find one of these 10 other locations germane to the context of our Republic's 43rd presidency:
1) Iraq. The Presidential Library is reportedly to be built at a cost of $200 million to $500 million dollars. With a few trillion already spent to prepare us for another hundred years in the Middle Eastern desert, perhaps the G.W. Bush Presidential Library investment should instead provide a military hospital, recreation, vacation and rehabilitation destination for our active duty troops. I support the work of our military without question, and thank them for their service to our nation. The library money should be dedicated to those who will truly be living the George W. Bush legacy.
2) The Edwards Aquifer. Since George W. Bush adopted Texas as his home and became the state's governor, it might be wise to build his library in a natural location which has quenched the thirst of millions of incoming immigrants. Since George W. has made no attempt to stop the flow of undocumented foreigners, building his library in a place historically hospitable to illegal newcomers could prove successful. Sinking the Presidential Library underwater would save precious terrain, and would be a "heckuva" (patronage) job for Michael D. "Brownie" Brown. A free driver's license and Social Security card for the first 10,000,000 to reach the turnstile would guarantee a wild grand opening. All the guides must be bilingual, as are many of our nation's blighted urban public schools.
3) Mars. It's been nearly four years since President Bush took a most odd wartime detour to announce an itinerary for humans wishing to travel to Mars. I haven't heard much about Mars lately, and I really want to go. Since President Bush seems to have forgotten about his red planet plans, it could be quite an incentive for him to get back on the ball. By putting the Presidential Library on Mars, we may place George W. Bush's administration materials closer to the source of their ideological origin.
4) An Elementary School (Any). Listening to President Bush's diction and vocabulary these past eight years has many wondering if he is one of those poor left-behind children about whom we fret. With this golden Presidential reservoir of materials including such hallowed publications as My Pet Goat, an elementary school Presidential Library could be a boon for the students. It would provide an almost endless supply of literature written at or below their grade levels, with daily visitors replacing education dollars our government can ill afford.
5) Osama Bin Laden's house. Osama has to live somewhere, and so far our hundreds of billions of dollars haven't been able to find him. By ordering the George Walker Bush Presidential Library built in Osama's house, the architects and builders would be forced to locate OBL to negotiate easements, shared utilities and community impact. Bush would get his library and Osama would be found, as no contractor is going to turn down a half billion dollar project on a technicality.
6) The Federal Reserve. With the dollar crashing worldwide, it won't be long before foreign investors begin picking apart the assets of our nation. Since the Federal Reserve hasn't much to offer these days, it would be a safe place for the Presidential Library to go into exile. If homeless homeowners fill the Marriner S. Eccles Federal Reserve facility, the U.S. Treasury building will also be available.
7) The Mexican Border. There's no saying in real estate more powerful than "Location, Location, Location." By establishing the Bush Presidential Library on the Mexican border, we would guarantee a constant flow of fans more than willing to study their patron saint and buy a U.S. map. The only problem would be finding the border, as Mr. Bush's administration has sought to remove most identifying characteristics of our national sovereign boundary.
8) An abandoned factory (Any). Given the breakneck speed exodus of American manufacturing jobs, there are hundreds of potential locations with suitable square footage for a presidential library. When Flint, Michigan went bust years ago, they opened Six Flags Autoworld in an attempt to revitalize a decimated local economy. It's possible a Presidential Library would deliver promise to some rust belt town, even if it goes bankrupt and closes within a year like Flint's indoor amusement park. There is no reason to authorize new construction when so many empty manufacturing shells give proper testament to the Bush economy.
9) Courthouse steps (Any). With the gargantuan number of residential foreclosures during the Bush Administration's final curtain call, arranging the Bush mementos along the steps of any given courthouse would insure a large number of visitors. Don't tell this Republican about the twelve year slide from Clintonian policies, as the Bush Administration's financial czars should have seen this mess brewing long ago. President Clinton is to blame for a pile of critical, systemic problems, but not this one.
10) Shanghai, China. There is no doubt most of the materials for the Bush Library will be sourced from China. From building materials, large screen televisions and furniture to light switches and plumbing supplies, an argument can be made to leave his library on the continent he has benefited the most. Although William Jefferson Clinton opened the brave new (one) world floodgates, George Walker Bush has served as multiculturalist-in-chief for eight straight years.
I wrote this list in a tongue-in-cheek manner, but in review I'm not so sure. Mr. Bush has completely ignored all aspects of fiscal conservatism and has sent our collective finances into a tailspin none of us can comprehend. This presidency has been most dangerous to our Republic's future, and our expensive handling of the Middle East/Radical Islam concern has proven potentially ineffective long term. By gutting our manufacturing economy and nurturing an hospitable environment for leftist liberalism, the key motivations of George W. Bush will be impossible to sustain into the next presidency. My kids, their kids, and their kids will pay a dear, hurtful price for my two votes.
The George Walker Bush Library might also be attached to the Carter Center, Chernobyl or some other disturbing site worthy of avoiding.
Jason M. Kibby
Ringgold
ringgold@gmail.com